


The First Months

by TheGriefPolice



Series: James Finds Home [1]
Category: Original Work
Genre: ABDL, Baba!Hal, Completed, Cribs, Daddy!John, Diapers, Hurt/Comfort, Infantilism, M/M, Non-Sexual Age Play, Nursery, Pacifiers, Teddy Bears, baby!James, bottles, readhead
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-27
Updated: 2016-05-27
Packaged: 2018-07-10 11:05:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 24,350
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6981781
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheGriefPolice/pseuds/TheGriefPolice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>James has had a hard time. At 18 years old, he's suffered more than any one person should. When he meets Hal and John, he never thought the men would be the most important thing in the world to him.<br/>And John and Hal never thought they'd find the perfict little boy.</p>
<p>(Inspired by the work of @xenabear.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

James stood up from his seat at the library, his time on the computer up. He looked at the clock on an adjacent and saw that the library would be closing soon and he would be dumped back out into the cold again. He sighed, pulled his backpack from the back of the chair and swung it over his shoulders, walking towards the exit. He walked towards a street corner that he would normally sit at when the nights were cold.

It was always a risk to be so close to Main Street where the cops patrolled, but he needed at least a little money to get something to eat tonight. He took his normal seat, clearing away some of the flurries so they wouldn't melt onto his pants when he sat. He didn't want his pants wet already, normally his weak bladder would do that for him when he feel asleep. He pulled a thin blanket out of his backpack, then sat the deflated bag against the wall as he wrapped himself up and set out a cup, throwing in the few cents he had before leaning back.

His small size made him look more like a twelve year old that his real age. He got a lot of sympathy change for it, so he didn't mind being thought of as little. And his blanket wouldn't have covered him as well as it did otherwise. He watched as people passed, learning the hard way not to make eye contact with them, and instead starring at their shoes. Most of them were nice loafers or snug snow boots, normal of this side of town. A few of them dropped change into the cup, one even put a dollar in. He became very excited, knowing he'd be able to eat something would be nice.

His lanky figure was not a fashion choice after a year of sitting on the side of the road like this. He forgot the last time he ate, it must have been sometime in the last few days, he was sure, but didn't know the exact day. Most of them bled right into the next when he corner sat.  
He pulled the over sized hoodie's hood over his face more to fight against the windshield and closed his eyes.

A few weeks back he had searched up ways to help his late night accidents, using the library's computer to do so in a distant corner. He'd read about a lot of things, but one that caught his attentions was something about ABDL. It was an interesting thing, and followed it up with several other searches. It had seemed like something that he would have liked to join, and, amongst his searches, found a nice couple looking for a boy like him. There names were Hal and John, and they really seemed to like James. They'd talk when he could find a computer and had mentioned wanting to meet him. James was so happy he almost shed tears.

He liked the amenity of the whole situation. Being able to just tell them things without worrying about their faces twisting and frowning was nice. James hadn't told them everything, there was no way he could. But he had let it slip that his weak bladder had a way of showing up before, and they said they didn't mind. He had panicked after the message had been sent, but their replies made him want to meet them even more. He was supposed to meet with them in a few days at a McDonalds down the road, but he was still unsure.

A small panic had set in his stomach as another coin was dropped into his cup. He cracked his eyes open to see as a pair of shoes walked off. The panic wore off as he drifted into a light sleep.  
He woke up the next morning to a chill running down his spine. When his eyes popped open, he realized it was still dark out and no one was on the road. He sighed, twisting his arms to wake up his stiff mussels as he reached for his bag. Just then, a man came running down the street. James thought nothing of it until the man scooped up his cup and ran the other way.

James shoot up, running after the man. "Hey, that's mine!" He yelled, trying with all his might for his small, short, untoned legs to catch up. He saw the man turn a corner and James followed him into the alley.

The man was waiting and pushed a fist into James's stomach. James folded in half and fell over. The man landed a few good kicks onto him as another guy walked up.

"Just give up!" The new man yelled, kicking him in the back.

James looked up from his fetal position and up at his attackers, trying to see their faces. But they were already running down the alley and turning onto another street. James heaved his body off the pavement, finding it hard to move. His chest was tight in pain and it hurt to breath. He coughed, feeling his eyes as they grew hot in their sockets. The tears fell onto his check, even with his resistance. It was cold by the time it fell onto the street below. He wiped his eyes on his sleeve, leaning against the wall as he pushed himself to stand up. Wobbling, he walked back to the street to grab his meager belongings and find a new place to beg.

The walk was a lot more work than he thought it would be, the need to lean against something and stop frequently hindering his ability to walk. The world spun as he sat down onto his blanket and wrapped it around himself. The cold seeped into his bones as he he nodded off, trying to ignore the pain of the bruises he was sure were forming on his side.

He woke up the next morning to someone kicking his feet. "Come on, kid. Wake up." Someone said.

James opened his eyes to see a man standing in front of him. He kicked his feet again and James sat up, feeling the kicks even more now than he did last night. "Come on, kid. Come on." He said, kicking his foot one last time. "Get up."

James sat up and the man grabbed his arm, hauling him to his feet easily. "Where you from, kid?" He asked. James realized it was a cop as the light flashed off a badge. His heart beat became fast as a panic set in, the pain in his chest fading away as adrenaline pumped through his system. He would have tried to pull away, but he knew it would never work.

"You going to answer me? Where'd you run from, huh?" He asked, picking up James's back pack and handing it to him.

"I--I--I didn't--" He started.

"I don't want to hear your sob story, kid. I'll take you to the station and you'll give me your folk's number, and then you're going home." He said, pulling James along.

James tried to push the man's hand off his elbow to no avail. He was dragged down the road, his foot steps half the length of the man pulling him. When they entered the police station, the smell of stale coffee and ciggerats came in with every ragged breath James took. He was thrown into a seat next to a desk, aggravating his ribs and the bruises that formed there.

"Who's this," the cop at the desk, a much thinner man with a goatee, asked.

"Runaway I found on the street. Call his parents or foster parents or whatever to come get him." The bigger one said.

The thin man sighed. "Alright, I'll see if I can pull their numbers from him. See you later, Paul. Stay safe."

"Will do." He said. He glanced down at James. "Have fun."

The thin man let out a light laugh, the kind that said there was about as much of a chance of that happening as hell freezing over. "Alright, kid, give me the number, I'll call them, it'll all go down smoothly. Okay?" James was about to tell him that he wasn't a little kid when the man put his finger up. "Look, kid. I don't have much time, okay. Don't give me false numbers, don't give me excuses, none of that. Just a phone number where I can tell them you're here."

James saw it was pointless to tell him anything and instead kept his mouth shut. If they weren't going to listen, he wasn't going to say anything.

"Or, I could have you put in Juvy for a robbery." James's head shoot up to look at them man's apathetic face. "I'm guessing you didn't get that shiner from messing around on the playground." He said.

"That's not--" James started.

The man put his hand up to stop him. "Just the number."

James sighed. He didn't have anyone to call, no numbers that he could even play off as parents. Then he remembered that Hal had given them their number one night during their chats, telling him to call if he ever needed their help. He gave the man the number, it being his last hope.

The man, who he know noticed was named Officer Gordon, tapped the numbers onto a phone and waited for them to pick up. "Hello, this is Officer Gordon from the city Police. I have your son--What's your name, kid?" He asked. James told him, knowing it would help the situation along. "James--sitting here in my station. We're gonna need for you to pick him up." The officer waited for a few seconds as the other line responded. "Okay, thanks."

Gordon sat the phone down into its socket and looked at the boy sitting at his desk. "They'll be here in a bit. Sit tight, don't run off, don't cause problems, and you'll be able to leave quickly."

James nodded, his heart skipping at the mention of meeting Hal and John. A police station didn't seem like the right place to let it all go down, but it's not like he had much of a choice at the moment. His chest still hurt when he breathed, but his anxiety made him focus on the knot that sat high in his chest as he waited. He looked up at the door every time it opened, most of it being other officers coming in and out or an old person making a complaint at the help desk.

He was starting to think they wouldn't come when he saw two heads walk into the station. One was dressed in a long black coat, a tie poking out from under a nice sweater under the coat and slacks hanging from his waist. He had short cut black hair, sticking up dashingly. The other had red hair that sat a little longer, brushing his brow as it swayed. He had on a dark jeans and a thick jacket with a button up on underneath. They scanned the room until they saw James slumped over in his seat.

They smiled as they made their way back towards the boy. "Hey," the red head said.  
The officer looked up at the two men and down at James. "You two here for him?" He asked.  
"Yeah." The black haired one said. "I'm John, this is Hal." He introduced.

"Good to meet you, sirs." Officer Gordon said, standing up and shaking their hands. "Glad your here. Kid was sleeping on the street right off Main. Officer Right found him this morning on his patrol."

John's face knotted as Hal looked at the boy concerned. "Thank you, Officer. And thank you for calling us." John said.

"No problem. You should get him home." The officer said, adjusting his utility belt around his waist.

"Will do, thank you." John said, once more taking the man's hand and shanking it. The officer nodded as Hal reached out his hand to James, who took the help getting up and followed them out of the station, trying not to limp from his beating the night before.

When they were outside the station, walking towards the car, James broke down. "I'm so sorry," he cried. "I didn't mean to get in trouble and bother you, but they said I'd go to Juvy and I was scared and I didn't know what to do."

"Hey, hey, hey." Hal said, squatting down to reach the boy's eyes. "It's okay. It's okay. We gave you that number for things like this. You're not in any trouble." He wiped away one of the boys tears as John joined him.

"You're okay now, bud. We won't let them take you anywhere." John said, rubbing the boy's hair.

James sniffled, rubbing his nose on a sleeve. "I just-- I just--"

"What is it buddy, huh?" Hal asked.

"I want to go home." James cried.

John gave Hal a slight side smile. "Alright then, let's go home, yeah?"

James nodded as they took his hand and led him to the car. It was a four door silver model with a nice interior. James was surprised when they helped him strap in and Hal climbed into the back with him as John drove. James watched the window as tree after tree flew by, making his eyes tired. Before he knew it, he heard the sound of a door opening and closing as someone wrapped their arms around him and lifted him up.

"John, he weighs less than a bag of feathers." Hal said to John as he carried James through the door.

"Poor guy, he's probably worn out after all that." John said, rubbing the boy's hair.

Hal carried James into a bedroom, sitting his head down on the pillow as John grabbed a pair of pajamas. "We're going to change you, okay bud." Hal whispered into his ear.

James nodded his head, still half asleep and not wanting to move. Both men undressed him, gently lifting his arms and pulling his hoodie off, then the sweater, than his shirt. As the only three things he owned beside his pants were taken off, James stired a bit. Hal gasped as he saw the bruises on James's abdomen and back that were a deep shade of purple. He looked up at John who saw the sight and nearly cried for the boy as she gently ran a finger around one. It was large and deep without a chance in the world that it didn't hurt like nothing ever before.

"Explains the one on his face." Hal said, rubbing the boy's head softly as he brushed away some of James's bangs to get a better look. "How could this happen?"

John sighed, squeezing his partner's shoulder tightly. "Let's get him dressed and under the covers."

Hal nodded, slipping of the boy's oversized shoes that had been stuffed with news paper to keep them from sliding around and dropping them onto the pile with all of his other over side clothes. They gently pulled off his pants, and sat they in the pile as well. As John redressed him into pajamas, Hal gathered the clothes and put them into a plastic bag to be washed or thrown away depending on what James wanted when he woke up.

When Hal came back, John had the boy fully dressed and was pulling the blankets up to his chin. Hal leaned against the doorway as John finished up.

"He's small." John smiled.

"He's everything we could have hoped for." Hal smiled back, taking John in his arms and hugging him tight. "He's so cute!"

"Let's let him rest." John said. "Come on." He cracked the door just enough to see inside then walked with Hall down to the Living room.


	2. Chapter 2

James was happy for once, his dreams giving him a glimpse of an ocean. He sat on the warm sand, content with the sun beating down on his face. He smiled as he looked around, the palm trees swaying lightly.

When he finally did drift back into the land of the conscious, he shifted his weight from his side to his back, only then realizing how his pants stuck to him. When he moved the covers back, he could see the dark spot on the sheets and his pants from his latest accident.

It wouldn't have been so bad had Hal and John not picked that moment to check in on him. They had been siting downstairs in the living room when they noticed it was late, and they should probably wake up their boy. They had walked upstairs and opened the door when they saw James sitting in a puddle.

James heart started beating fast as he looked from man to man and then onto the floor. His eyes were wide and scared. "I'm-I'm-I didn't--"

Hal ran over to the boy and James flinched as Hal picked him up and sat him on the floor. James was shaking in his PJ's as Hal pulled him in for a hug. "It's okay, it's okay." Hal whispered. "You're okay."

"I messed up the bed. I'm sorry." James cried.

James fell apart as John came over and picked the boy up from Hal's arms and walked with his towards the bed. "You want to see something?" He asked lightly to the crying boy. James nodded no, but John showed him anyway. "This bed is special. It keeps anything from soaking it to it. Isn't that cool." John lifted the corner of the sheet to show him the plastic mattress cover. "You didn't mess up anything and we aren't mad. Not one bit."

James nodded, tucking his face into John's shoulder. "Let's go get you washed up, okay buddy." He said, picking up his boy and carrying him to the bathroom that attached to the bedroom and started running the bath. Hal came in and helped the boy out of his soiled clothes, careful not to irritate any of the bruises that covered his small body. They looked much worse in the light of the bathroom, showing the clear difference between skin and scars over most of his body from past injuries. Hal looked over at John who had the same look on his face as Hal was sure he had: pure disgust. Not at the boy, but at whoever had caused this.

Hal hated to ask the boy, but he had to know. "Hey, buddy, what happened to you here?" He asked, pointing to one of the marks on his arm.

James looked at his arm to where Hal pointed, pushing back from John. "A man took my change cup." He sniffled. "I tried to get it back, but, but, he had a friend and they hit me and I'm too small to hit back, and they--"

Hal pulled him close, his body stiffening from the touch. "It's okay, you don't have to think about." He said.

James nodded, and pushed away. Hal glanced up at John and gave him a look that said, we have to look into this later. John nodded and helped James out of his pants and underwear, lifting him into the large bathtub full of warm water.

"I'll stay with him if you want to change the sheets." John said to Hal. 

Hal nodded and walked out of the bathroom and to the linen closet to grab fresh sheets before going back to the bedroom to take off the soaked sheets and swap them out for new ones. When he was finished, he walked back to the bathroom just in time to see John lifting the boy out of the tub and wrapping him in a towel. It was a normal towel to Hal and John, but was oversized for the short, thin boy. John rubbed him dry lightly, trying, and failing, not to touch any of the bruises. James whimpered a bit, but otherwise didn't complain. When he was dry, Hal held out both a pair of underwear and a pull-up for the boy to chose from.

James thought for a second, then pointed to the pull-up. Hal smiled and held it out for the boy to slip into. When he was in the pull up, John gave him a onesie and helped him into it, zipping it up to his neck for him.

Hal got a quick glimpse of the boy's green eyes before they darted back down to the floor. Hal patted the boy's head and lead him out of the bathroom and back out into the hall. They padded down the stairs and headed to the kitchen when John was cooking.

"Hey bud, hungry?" John asked, smiling at the boy.

James smiled, looking forward to the aspect of food. Hal lifted him up and put him in a booster seat and strapped him in. James watched as John stirred a pot on the stove, Hal noticing the boy's stairs but not scolding him for it. John glanced back to see him starring, then looked back at the pot saying, "Just something simple tonight, bud. Mac and cheese sound good?" 

James nodded his head as John took the pot off the stove and pulled out a few bowls. Hal grabbed two glasses and a sippy cup, filling all three with milk. When they sat down, they placed a small bowl and the sippy cup in front of him, giving him a small spoon that fit well in his hand.

He shoveled it down quickly, happy to have something in his stomach for once.  
"Slow down, okay bud. Don't need you chocking or something." John said, whipping James's face with a paper towel.

James slowed down a bit, but not enough. When his bowl was empty, he held it out, silently asking for more. Hal laughed, happily agreeing to the boy's request. Once the bowl was set down in front of him again, he started going back at it the same pace as before. John laughed a little as some of it fell onto his shirt. He pushed his bowl out to ask for another.

John eyed Hal, then looked back at James. "I think we should wait a second bud," he said. "We don't want you getting sick."

James pouted a bit, but didn't fight back. Instead, he reached for the milk and gulped it down, watching as the older men finished. When they did, they unstrapped James and sat him down in the floor.

The sudden movement made James a little sick, but he pushed it down and reached up onto the table to grab his bowl, but Hal beat him to it. "No need for that, bud. We've got it." He smiled down, rustling James's hair before walking off to set them in the sink. James was at a loss of what to do, standing awkwardly in the middle of the dinning room. He moved against one of the walls and sat down to wait for them to finish. He could hear them as the water ran and they placed dishes under the faucet before putting them in the dishwasher. 

Once finished, John walked over to find James leaning against the wall. "Hey, let's get ready for bed, okay."

James looked up, not meeting his eyes, and shock his head yes. John reached his hand out and James placing his much smaller hand inside of it, letting John lift him to his feet. The movement turned his stomach and he couldn't hold it down. Suddenly, everything from dinner came up.

John called out to Hal who was still in the kitchen, and Hal came running. James stepped back, the sudden movement of the men around him making him scared. John took note, but still reached out his hand to rub James's back as he let a few more movements go and then stopped. Hal grabbed a towel and started cleaning it up as John lifted him up and sat him in the living room.

There was nothing on his clothes, but the boy looked miserable. He was stiff on the couch, his tenseness showing clearly on his face. John wanted to hold him and rock back and forth, but his reactions didn't make it look like he wanted to be touched at all at that moment. Every time they did, he would tense up before they even got close. John reached slowly out to the boy, hoping not to scare him as he whipped his face with a towel.

"Maybe we just ate too much, huh?" John smiled at him.

James looked briefly at the man's face, not meeting his eyes, them let his sight fall on the man's knees and he whipped his face one last time. The taste of stomach acid still hung in his mouth, making him even more sick. He knew he shouldn't have eaten so much, but it tasted so good. Food had been so spares, and them giving him two full bowls made it feel like Christmas.

Hal came over after cleaning up the mess and crouched down next to John. "You feel okay?" He asked, reaching slowly to the boy's forehead to test his body heat. "You're not warm. Must have been from eating so much." Hal gave a soft smile.

James nodded. "Sorry."

"Nothing to be sorry about, bear." John said. "It's not your fault."

A tear ran down his face as James looked down even further. John took that moment to pull the boy into his arms and hug him. James fell against the man's warm chest and strong arms, his tears falling silently, soaking the man's shirt. He gripped tightly to John's shirt as Hal rubbed his back, putting him to an unintentional sleep.

"He couldn't have eaten that much." Hal said. "We only filled the bowl a little."

"Maybe it was just the shock to his system to have real food in it." John said, looking down at the boy crumpled up in his arms. "If that officer was right, and he was living on the streets, than this wasn't his first night there. He looks like he's malnourished. And has been for a while."

"You mean to say that he's been out there longer than we thought?" Hal asked.

"We had tossed around the idea that he wasn't living at home after he said that he was always on a library computer, but I never thought that this was why." John felt tears come to his eyes. "All this time he's been alone and no one would help him."

Hal rubbed his partner's back, setting his head on his shoulder. "But now he has us, and we'll never let him even miss a meal again."

"Never." John agreed, putting his head on top of his partner's. "Never."


	3. Chapter 3

They carried James off to the room and tucked him in. Hal kissed him on the head, followed by John doing the same before closing the door with only a crack left open.

They both fell into a light sleep, waking lightly periodically to see if James was having trouble. When they didn't hear anything, they'd fall back asleep. This happened several times through the night before Hal woke up to a soft whimpering. He got up, slipping on his slippers before walking to where James slept to see what happened.

James's eyes were close tightly and he wiggled around between the sheets. John stepped up behind Hal and looked into the room. "What's up?" He asked, rubbing his eyes to see better into the room.

"I think he's having a bad dream. Should we wake him?" Hal asked. The boy was clearly miserable.

"Yeah, we better. I don't want him to not get any sleep." John said, stepping into the room.  
James looked so small to the two older men as he kicked around in his sheets. They were tangled around his feet and compleatly kicked off his chest.

Hal reached slowly down to his small shoulder, barely even touching it before the boy shoot out of bed and ran for the corner. Only, his feet were still tangled around the sheets and he tripped.

Adrenaline was pumping through his vanes as he panicked, kicking his feet as hard as he could to be set free. Hal rushed to the other side of the bed to grab the boy before he hurt himself, only scaring James more. He kicked harder, throwing his weight around until his feet finally came free and he shoot for any cover. He was screaming, but hadn't realized it until Hal had his arms around the boy, pulling him close. That's when he could hear his screams echoing off the walls and stopped. 

Hal rocked back and forth and John came close and sat down next to Hal.

"Shh, shh, shh," Hal said. "It's okay, your safe. We won't hurt you, I promise." Hal rocked lightly back and forth, rubbing the boy's head and shushing him. James was still stiff in Hal's arms, but took in his sweet sent with each stuttered breath through sobs. It took time, but eventually the boy calmed down to the point where they could talk to him.

James's face was red and hot as he looked up at the men, then closed his eyes tightly. "You're okay, buddy. You're okay. You're here in my arms and no one is going to hurt you." Hal whispered. "Do you want to tell us what happened? It might help."

James whipped away tears that still clung to his face with his sleeve, then pushed away from Hal, nodding no.

"Okay, you don't have to. Maybe later, when your not so sleepy, right." Hal said, reaching for the boys arm to rub it.

James was tired, something he hadn't noticed in his panic. As the adrenaline worked its way out of his system, he could feel his legs buckling under his weight as he fell into Hal's arms. "There we go." He said, pulling the boy close.

James's first instinct was to push Hal away, but his arms were too weak and his body too flustered to do anything as the man stood up and placed him on the bed.

John could see that the pull up he had on was soaked, so he ran to grab another and came back as Hal was inching the pants off the boy's legs. John sat the diaper down for Hal as he went through the process of changing him. James didn't move, still in between awake and asleep as they slid his pants back into his legs and tucked him back into bed.

"We should stay with him tonight, just in case anything else happens." John said, watching as they boy's breaths steadied into a rhythm.

"Yeah, I'll take first watch if you want to get some sleep." Hal said, squeezing his partners hand.

John leaned in and kissed him lightly on the lips. "Together." He said.

A small smile lifted Hal's face as a leaned into John's chest, wrapping his arms around the man and hugging him. "Sounds good."


	4. Chapter 4

James woke up slowly the next morning, opening his eyes only to close them again during drift back to sleep. He was surrounded by warm blankets in a warm bed with a soft pillow and he didn't want to wake up for the world. Eventually, he did drift back into the world of the conscious and his eyes fluttered open, giving him a look at the room around him.

It was big with large windows that where covered in fancy looking drapes. He sat up, wincing as he remembered the pain in his chest. He looked around at the shag carpet where two men sat against a wall, cuddled next to each other.

He opened his eyes, always being a light sleeper and hearing the boy move. He sat up to watch as James looked around, then landed his eyes on Hl and John as they slept. Hal pretended to be asleep, just to see what the boy would do. To Hal's surprise, James just stairs at them. Not a mean stair or a weirded out stair, but an observant stair, like he was trying to take everything in before it diapered.

When John started waking up, Jame's eyes darted back to his hands. "'Morning," John mumbled.

Hall looked over at John and smiled, "'Morning. I think someone's up."

John's eyes flashed over to James Ashe sat up in bed. John shifted his weight to stand up, helping Hal to his feet before sitting next to his boy on the bed.

John rustled the boy's hair. "How'd you sleep." James shrugged, and John looked over at Hal. "Why don't we get something in you, huh. Eggs sound good?"

James nodded, pushing the blankets away gently to get up. John lifted the boy up and sat him gently on the floor. John looked up,mouthing to Hal to grab some clothes. Hal nodded and walked out as John worked around the zipper of his PJ's, pulling it down so he could peel it away from the boy. When it was off, John had to hold his breath at the sight of the all the bruises, looking even worse now. "Do these hurt?" He asked.

"It's s'okay." James mumbled.

John sighed as Hal asked walked back in and handed him a pair of pants and a long sleeve t shirt. Hal helped as John slid the shirt down over the boy's head and helped him push his arms through. When he was finally dressed, John lifted him up and carried him down the stairs to the kitchen. They strapped him into his booster seat and gave him a sippy cup full of milk before starting breakfast. James sucked away as the men fried up a few eggs and put it onto a plate, cutting up the egg into small pieces before setting it down in front of the boy.  
When James didn't immediately reach for it like before, the couple eyed each other, then sat down. John took James's spoon and lifted it to his mouth. James eyed the spoon, but opened his mouth all the same for the food to come in.

"There you go. It's good, right?" John smiled, reassuring him.

James have a soft side smile and opened his mouth for another bite. John happily agreed, giving the boy another spoonful. Hal smiled at the boy's sudden change in attitude, going from a sour mood to his current carefree one.

When James finished, Hal walked him to the living room asking what movie he'd like to watch.  
James shrugged his shoulders and sat down on the couch. "How about I pull a few out and you choose." James nodded and Hal walked over to their move collection, pulling a few off the shelf and walking back over, holding them out for James to see. The boy scanned them over, then pointed to Peter Pan. Hal smiled, taking the DVD and putting it into the player.

He walked off to talk to John, leaving him on the couch.

"Is he settled?" John asked, throwing the dish towel over his shoulder.

"Yeah. I think those bruises hurt a lot more than he lets on." Hal said, rubbing his hands together. 

"We should have him looked at." John sighed. "But I don't know who won't scare him. He tenses up every time we touch him, like we're going to hit him or something."

"I know. I was thinking that maybe Carson could help." Hal said, sitting down at the island.  
"You think he would? We wouldn't be able to go to him, so he'd have to come to us." John said.

"Carson's always been a bit of a hippy, I don't think he'd have any problem. Last time we talked he's just finished med school and was working a freelance thing down in the rough part of town doing what he can." Hal said. "Want me to call him just to see?"

"Well, worst thing that could happen is that he says no. Mig as well give it a try." John grabbed the phone and tossed it to Hal, the watched as Hal punched in the numbers and dialed.

"This is Carson." The phone blared.

Half flinched, turning down the volume, then putting the phone back to his ear. "Hey Carson, this is Hal."

"Oh, Hal! Haven't heard from you in a while, what's up?" 

John leaned in the near the conversation from the other side as well. "Oh, nothing much. We just have a favor to ask you."

"Anything man."

"Is there anyway you could make it out here today, we need you to, well, to examine a boy were looking after." Hal hoped he didn't come off as harsh, but he needed Carson to understand what they needed.

"Yeah man, totally. No problem. I'll be there by lunch if John is cooking." Carson joked. John laughed a bit.

"We can do that." John said. His cooking skills were well known and well liked.

"Great. See you then!" Carson laughed.

"Yeah, see you."

Hal hung up the phone and looked over at John. "Man has always been a sucker for a free meal."

John laughed and looked into the living room at James who sat stiffly on the couch. "Think he'll be okay?" John asked.

Hal sighed. "I hope so. I really do."

"Last night," John started.

"Was his first night. Once he feels okay around us, he'll be able to settle down more. I just know it." Hal grabbed one of John's arms and squeezed it before walking off to the living room. "Hey bud," he said once he got there. "How's the movie?"

"Okay." James said.

"That's good." Hal replied, sitting down next to him on the couch. "We're going to have someone come over for a bit, okay. He's going to make sure you're okay."

James nodded, showing he heard the comment, but not stating his opinion.


	5. Chapter 5

Later that afternoon, after the movie had finished, Carson knocked on the door. Hal ran to open it up, letting the man into their home. "Thanks for coming," he said, taking Carson's jacket.

"No problem." Carson smiled back, taking off his shoes and walking into the living room.  
James was sitting stiff backed on the couch, looking up as Carson came in. Carson gave him a smile, walking over to sit on the other ice of the coffee table.

"Hey little man." He greeted. "I'm Carson."

James breathed in sharply has Carson held his hand out. Carson took note, but didn't mention it at the moment. 

Hal walked up slowly behind James, sitting on the couch. "James, this is Carson. He's the one we told you about before."

James nodded, his eyes never leaving the table.

"I'm here to make sure everything is all there." Carson smiled. "So, can I ask you some questions?" James nodded yes again. "Cool. Here, give me your hands. One, two, three... Yup, all ten are here. And you have a nose," Carson put the boy's nose between two luckless and squeezed lightly.

James looked up up at the man, meeting his eyes fora second, then setting them on his sweater.

"Check. How about teeth?" Carson asked. "Can you smiled and show me?"

James looked over at John who sat in one of the oversized love seats, smiling lightly. James opened his mouth wide and showed the man his teeth.

"Nice. You look great." What seemed like a silly game was really Carson testing for signs of anything they should be concerned about. His fingers had clearly been broken more than once, but had been set well enough not to show it unless you squeezed them. He hadn't been around people that smoke much, clear by the way his face didn't twist when he'd grabbed the boy's nose. His teeth were white, showing he took care of them when he could, but had a long history of malnutrition. "I heard you had quite a tumble the other night."

James looked up, his eyes darting from Carson to John, then to Hal before finally returning to his feet which dangled off the couch. "I didn't know there where two of them." He said, twisting his hands in his lap. "I just wanted my money back. But they wouldn't give it and the just kept kicking me and I couldn't fight back." A tear fell down his face.

Carson's eyes looked over to John, who moved to comfort the boy.

John sat down on the couch and pulled James into his lap, wrapping his arms around the small frame of the boy and surrounding him in his warmth. James didn't fight back, leaning into the larger man's chest and gripping his shirt as tears fell. He just wanted to be held, to have someone that he wouldn't have to worry about hitting him or kicking him out. Hal and John seemed so nice and had already done so much, but James had a hard time keeping his hopes up about staying here. 

"Is that where the owies came from?" Hal asked, crossing his legs as he sat down next to John.

James nodded, tucking his face further into John's chest.

"Would it be okay for Carson to see the owies? To make sure that you'll be okay?" Hal asked, placing a hand softly on the boy's back.

James tensed up in John's arm. "I don't wike doc'tars." James said, not wanting to be pricked and prodded my weird metal objects.

"But I'm not just any doctor, bud." Carson said. "I'm a super doctor. I have a superpower that can take away any owies and give candy." Carson flexed like a cartoon character to play the part a little better.

Hal's eyes filled with appreciation. Carson was a great friend. He's always been accepting of Hal's life choices, in ways that some of his oldest friends and even parents weren't. But going so far and being so accepting almost made Hal cry. He whipped his eyes before anything had a chance to fall.

James looked through John's arms at the man and smiled at his silliness. "No needles?" He asked.

"I promise." Carson smiled.

James nodded and didn't resist as John repositioned him in his lap so that he was sitting with his feet hanging hanging over John's. Carson helped pull off James's shirt and looked at his chest. It was a mangled mess of scars and flesh, the new marks mixing with old ones. Carson ran his fingers over the boy's small, boney chest lightly, feeling each bruise to make sure it wasn't marking a broken rib. It was clear by bumps on a large portion that the ribs had been cracked before. Some of them more than once.

"Give me your hand." He said to Hal. "You're going to want to know this." Hal reached out his hand and Carson placed it gently on the boy's rib. "That's a cracked rib that healed a few months ago."

Hal looked over as John felt the small bump on the bone. "What's it from?" He asked.

Carson looked over at James then said. "Maybe we should start making lunch. James could sit here and color or watch a movie as we work?"

John got the message and nodded yes. "Yeah, we can do that." He forced a smile. "That okay with you, bud?"

James nodded his head and John pulled him in for one more hug before sitting him on the couch with a fuzzy blanket wrapped around his shoulders to watch a movie.

The three men walked off to the kitchen, keeping an eye on the boy through side glances as they talked.

"Carson, you know something, don't you?" Hal asked. 

Carson nodded and leaned against the island, crossing his arms as he started. "I've seen this sort of thing a lot. On kids who've been in the foster system for a while. His actions support my theory; the way he flinches when you reach out to him, the way he never makes eye contact, and if he ever does, it seemed to only be a second before he diverts his eyes the other way. It's all very common in kids who have been serious victims of abuse."

John turned on the stove and sat a pan on it as he asked, "How long did it last?" He asked. To another person, his need to keep busy would make him seem heartless, but to Hal and Carson they knew it was the only way he could keep from falling apart.

"The oldest break I could feel happened when he was about four." Carson sighed. "Whoever did this, they were smart."

"What do you mean?" Hal asked, pulling out bread for John to make his famous grilled cheese.

"They only hit him places that could be covered up by clothing or easily explained with other reasons. He would have lived his life in over sized clothes at his size in the first place due to his small size, but it would have been even more needed to hide all of the abuse he faced." Carson closed his eyes a sighed. "It couldn't have been any level of easy for him."

Hal's eyes darted toward the boy's general direction. "All his life prepped were using him as their personal punching bag. No wonder he wakes up screaming."

John squeezed his partners shoulders, knowing all too well what Hal was feeling. Hal looked up at John, starring into the man's chocolate brown eyes before walking off to the living room and gathering James in his arms and sitting down with the boy in his lap. James fell lightly against the man's well toned chest and took in the warmth of the embrace as Hal held him close.

James liked the way the men smelled, like mint and old spice shampoo and clean laundry. He took it in with every breath, the warmth from the blanket and Hal lulling him into the first amount of good sleep he had since he as little.

"Lunch is ready." John whispered after walking into the living room and noticed that James was asleep. "How is he?"

"I think he's okay." Hal said, rubbing the boy's hair out of his eyes lightly, the light blond curls having a habit of falling into his face. "I just wanted to hold him. Not thing I know, I look down and he's asleep in my arms."

John smiled. "I think he likes it here."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Come on, let's eat." John lifted the boy from Hal's arms, carrying him down the hall and into a room James hadn't seen yet. It was a large nursery they had designed just for James based on they few things he'd said he liked. They'd painted the room a light green, what James had said was his favorite color, and decorated it with teddy bear faces. The furniture all matched, a medium wood that made up the crib, book shelf, and dresser that sat against the walls with a toy table in the middle.

John laid the boy down in the crib, pulling a blanket from the closet and tucking him in.

"Do you think he's ready for this?" Hal asked.

"I think he's been ready for this his whole life. He deserves this." John said.


	6. Chapter 6

"Is he asleep?" Carson asked.

"Yeah. He had a bit of a rough night last night." Hal said, sitting down at the table.

John sat a plate down in front of each man before sitting down himself. "So, what can we do?" He asked.

"What do you mean?" Carson asked.

"What can we do to help him? To help him get past why was and let him look forward to what is?" John asked. 

John had always had a way with words that Hal never understood, a way of putting things so simply and yet so beautifully. Hal had been wondering the same thing, but John had put it in a way that just made sense.

"Honestly, I think you're already doing it." Carson said. "He's noting going to want to be touched a lot at first, but don't take that as a sigh that he doesn't love you. Keeping eye contact with him will be very important, even if it seems like he's uncomfortable with it. He'll slowly make his way into being more expressive and willing. Try lots of things with him, find out what he likes, what he's good at."

John nodded. "Reassure him."

"Exactly. But one thing." Carson said, suddenly becoming very serious. "This boy has never trusted anyone. If you take a step down this road, you're in it for the whole marathon. Up's and downs. There's going to be a lot of turbulence. He's already finding a place here. Don't start this unless you intend to finish it."

Hal and John looked at each other, already knowing the answer. "He's not garbage. He is a boy, vulnerable and week and sad, and we will not be leaving him alone ver again." Hal said.

Cason closed his eyes and nodded. "Good." He let out a stressed sigh, loosening the mussels in his back. "Good." John and Hal smiled at one another. "You two are amazing, you know that?" Carson chuckled.

John let out a one syllable laugh. "No we're not; James is


	7. Chapter 7

James was happily surrounded by warmth, a think, heavy blanket weighing down on him, making him feel secure. He opened his eyes to the dark room and looked around. He was sitting in a crib, of that he was sure. But what he didn't know what where he was. He had a slight memory of drifting off in Hal's arms and being carried to bed, but was lost beyond that. He sat up yawning and rubbing his eyes, making a small squeaking sound as he stretched, then realizing that he had company in the bed as his hand hit something fluffy. 

He looked over and saw a stuffed bear that had a star on his belly. James reached out and pulled it into his lap, pushing the star to see what would happen. The belly lit up, casting a soft glow across the covers. A low song started playing, something James recognized, but didn't know from where.

The door clicked open as Hal came in to check on the boy. James's head turned to the door to see who it was and smiled when he saw the man walk in. "Hey bear." He said. "I see you found the stuffed guy, huh?"

James smiled and held him up, showing the glowing stomach. 

Hal laughed and lifted the boy out of the crib, feeling his loaded diaper, and setting him down on the changing mat. James occupied himself with the bear as Hal went through the process of changing the boy, whipping him clean and slipping him into a fresh pull up. When finished, Hal lifted James up and carried him to the living room where John sat reading a book.

"Hey, you knocked out pretty hard. You awake enough to eat?" John asked as Hal sat him down.

James nodded, stomach growling from the absence of food.

"Well, Daddy John's gonna go and get that ready okay." John got up, not realizing what he'd said until after the fact. Frozen in his half standing position, he turned to look at the boy's reaction.

His eyes were wide in shock. "Does dat mean you're go'na wet me sta'?" He asked, looking from one man to the other. His eyes didn't meet theirs, but it came very close.

"Does that mean you want to?" Hal asked.

James nodded, which Hal and John were starting to catch on to as his response to things when he didn't know what else to say.

John smiled and reached for the boy to wrap him in a hug. James flinched at first, but then leaned in a little excepting the jester as Hal came in and joined them.

"I'm Daddy John, okay. And that's Baba Hal." John said, whipping his eyes from the tears that pushed against his will.

James nodded and followed them into the kitchen, no longer feeling confined in the small space of the booster seat, but comforted instead. Baba strapped him in as Daddy warmed up the leftovers of lunch, cutting it into small pieces before setting it down for James to eat. James ate what he could, finding his stomach didn't have the same lust for food as it did before. When he was finished, he pushed his plate away and wiggled in his seat until Baba unbuckled him and let him go. James ran off, back to he coffee table to grab his bear before sitting down and messing with one of the magazines that sat on the table.

Most of the afternoon passed peacefully as James kept himself entertained himself, Hal and John making sure not to be more than a few strides away from the boy. He had a unique ability, they learned early on, to take things apart. 

James had grabbed the TV remote first, pulling off the battery cover and putting the batteries aside before he took off the face for the controller. He managed to use his small fingers to pry off one of the buttons from its socket before Hal caught him.

Baba had to try to not raise his voice, frustrated that he'd have to figure out how to put the remote together, but understanding that they hadn't yet gotten him much to play with. He sighed, telling James the if he wanted to play with something, there were a few toys in his room.

James was scared at first, Hal's initial reaction of running up to ask for the remote making his padding wet. Baba didn't raise his voice, but James wasn't any less afraid than if he had. When he smiled, said it was okay and he would figure out how to put it together, James crawled off to a corner and held his bear close.

When Hal walked off with the remains of the remote, James padded off to his room. He pulled a book off the shelf and opened it up to look at the pictures.

Hal walked into the office when John sat at their joined desks that faced each other. "We have a destroyer on our hands, hon." He said, setting the controller parts on the desk next to John.

John leaned back and looked at the mess. " Wow. He did this?" He asked. "That's kind of impressive." He laughed as he looked up at Hal's frustrated face. "He didn't break anything, he just took it apart. We can put it back together with ease."

Hal sighed, letting go of the small amount of anger he had in his chest. "You're right. He's in his room now. I'll see if I can put it back together if you want to go check on him."

John smiled. "Tools are in the top shelf. I'll be right back." With that, he stood up, kissing Hal lightly before walking down the hall and towards the boy's room.

James turned his head around when he heard John enter. "Hey, bear." He smiled.

James's eyes darted to the man's feet. His socks were white with gray tips, soft looking and comfortable as he took a step closer to the boy.

"You reading a book?" John asked, moving slowly and lightly to ensure he didn't alarm the boy. James nodded no. "Well, you're looking at it, right?" 

James nodded yes and looked back at the picture that covered the page. It was a large red dog with a blond little girl riding on his back. They both looked so happy.

"Ah, Cliford the Big Red Dog." John smiled as he sat cross legged next to the boy. "What's he doing?"

James looked over the picture. To be honest, he didn't know. He'd just opened the book to the middle and started scanning it. He shrugged his shoulders.

"Can you read it to me?" John asked, not giving up on getting the boy to say something.

James nodded no. John thought it was just that he didn't want to until he said, "Don't know how."

John looked the boy over, hoping he could see something that told him what he meant. "Don't know how to what, bud?"

James say silently for a moment, wondering if he should say. The page looked so interesting, he just didn't know what it meant beyond what he saw in the picture. "Read." He finally said, a tear falling down his face.

John's lips went tight. He'd hoped the boy wouldn't say that. That he had meant something else. But now it was clear. He didn't even have someone around him that cared enough about him to notice how he looked at a book with a lust to understand. Someone who would tell him it was okay and that they would help. No one was there to do even that.

All the beatings, all the homes, all the schools, yet he hadn't found one person to teach him to read. 

John took in a large breath, trying to keep from crying as he looked at the boy's small back. He wanted to wrap him up in his arms and tell him everything was okay, but John didn't want the boy to feel forced.

They sat in silence for a few minutes until James pushed the book over to John. John was confused at first, not understanding what the small boy was asking until he changed his posting to look at the older man. 

"Do you want me to read to you?" John asked.

James nodded yes, keeping his eyes low as he pushed the book an inch closer to John.

John smiled and flipped the book to the first page, seeing that as a proper place to start. He started reading slowly, setting the book on the floor after every page to show what he was reading. John was amazed at the way James would look at the book as he read, eyes wide and ready to take in everything. They sparkled in wonder as he saw each page's picture and John explained it.

James found this new thing fun, smiling as John changed his voice for every charter, making it higher for girls and deep and full for the men, then returning to his own as he described what was happening.

Hal walked in halfway through the book, grinning as he saw the boy more interactive than before. James leaned in a little as John sat the book down on the floor again to show him an image of a large red dog on a boat, taking up most of the free space. Hal walked in and sat down next to John lightly as he finished up the book. If James noticed, he didn't say.

"Did you like it?" John asked.

James smiled, nodding his head yes. It was the longest John had seen the kid keep any amount of eye contact before his eyes looked back at the book. And even then, it was different, because his eyes were occupied by something else, not diverted due to nervousness. 

John looked over at Hal, grabbing his hand and squeezing lightly, giving him a reassuring smile.


	8. Chapter 8

The next few days carried on the same way, Hal and John investing in a baby monitor in case anything happened like the first night he was here. James seemed to be opening up a little more, finding him self more comfortable in his new home. 

His room was, by far, his favorite place. He still didn't have many things to play with, but his Daddy and Baba kept him entertained throughout the day with movies and games. The last thing they wanted was him taking apart something they couldn't put back together as easily as a remote. The bruises from his back were already stating to dull to a yellow around the edges, making the men very happy.

"We should go to the store." Hal said when they sat in the office one day. James had fallen asleep in the living room, and, not wanting to risk waking him up, they had covered him up and put the baby monitor on the coffee table.

"Do we need something?" John asked, stopping his morning scroll of the news.

"Well, a little. I was thinking we should get James some more toy to play with. Movies and silly games will only last so long. Plus, it'll give him a chance to feel like all of this is his. Carson said it could help him feel at home." Hal said.

"Well, if it'll help, I'm game. Do you think James is ready to go out already?" 

"We can ask when he wakes up." Hal said. "But I think he'll enjoy getting some new things. We're also going to need more clothes for him. He only had what he wore on his back when he came here and we only have a few outfits for him." Hal said, sighing.

"Why they sigh?" John asked, brow pulled tight.

"I just want him to know this is his home now." Hal said.

John smiled over at his partner. "I get the feeling he already does."

"But he doesn't really talk, and when he does it's a single word. And he still has rough nights. He flinches when we walk around him. I just--"

"Hey, hey, hey," John said, getting up to pull Hal into his arms and hugging him closely. "Give it time. He'll find his voice soon enough. And everyone has rough nights. We just have to be here."

Hal nodded and leaned into his partner's embrace. "Yeah, you're right."

~~~

When James's eyes fluttered open, he saw that he had accidentally fallen asleep in the living room watching a movie, and sat up to look around. Daddy and Baba weren't around, so he hauled himself off the couch to go look for them. They weren't in his room or theirs, and the bathroom had a baby prof door knob so he couldn't check there. His next stop was their office, where he pushed the door open lightly. Baba sat in a chair reading a book that sat in his lap and Daddy sat typing at his computer. 

Both of them looked up as they saw the door move, their eyes falling on James as he stood in the hallway.

"Hey, bear." John smiled, getting up from his seat to pick the boy up. James stood still until John reached him and lifted him into his arms. "We didn't know you woke up yet."

James looked around as Hal got up and patted the boy's head. "We were thinking of going shopping with you if you want to go."

James nodded yes and Hal smiled. 

"Well then, we better go get ready. I believe that someone is wet." John said, feeling the boy's puffy diaper against his arms.

James blushed as he was carried back to his room and laid down on the changing mat. John changed him quickly, making sure to add a little more powder than usual before strapping the diaper tightly around his waist and lifting him to his feet.

They led him to the car after putting on his shoes and jacket, strapping him into a booster seat. James's small body fit right in as John pulled the set belt over his shoulder and bucked it. He tested the straps around James's shoulders with two fingers, pulling lightly to make sure the boy was in securely before nodding his approval and climbing into the front seat. Hal sat in the back with James as they drove towards the store.

They played music, trying to have James sing along. James hummed a few notes, but otherwise didn't join. That was more that Hal and John had been expecting, and they were ecstatic.

Once at the store, Hal unbuckled the boy and held tight to his hand and they walked into the store. They walked around the grocery first, putting a few things in the cart before the headed to the clothes isle.

Hal and John had hoped that James would point out the things he liked or even peaked his interest, but the boy just held onto Hal's hand lightly as he was guided around the displays.   
"Let go of his hand for a second." John suggested, pushing the cart to the side so it wouldn't block the isle.

Hal nodded and let go of James's hand. James's looked back, looking at his now empty hand and then the one that had previously been filling it.

"Point at something you like, bud." John said lightly.

James looked around, not seeing much of anything in the rows of boring older men's clothes.  
"Maybe we're just in the wrong isle." John smiled over at Hal. Hal looked questionably at his parter as he lead their group a few rows over, were more colorful clothes hung from racks. "What about now, bear?"

His head twisted around once more as James looked at all the clothes. He didn't really see anything until a shirt caught his eye. It was blue, with a bear ridding in a fire truck on the front. James pointed at it, and Hal followed his finger to the shirt holding it up for the boy to see more clearly. "This one?" He asked, smiling from ear to ear.

Another nod and Hal looked over at John, who had the same smile plastered to his face. Hal placed a shirt in a size that would fit the boy's slender frame in the cart and looked down as the boy held up his hand. Hal took it, his smiled even bigger.

The want of physical affection, even something as small as holing hands, from a kid who's been through all that James had, was a large step in a good direction. John's eyes were wide when he saw the jester. To anyone else is the store, it was just a boy reaching for his Baba's hand, but for John and Hal, it was a movement that sent their hearts fluttering.

They walked around, picking a few more shirts and pants, along with a few pairs of pajamas before heading to the toy isle.

James didn't know what to do when he was asked to pick something out. "For being so good." John had said. He held tight onto Hal's hand as they walked around, seeing many things that looked interesting and fun, but nothing that really spoke to him. His head switched from one side to the other as they walked.

Then he saw something perfect. It was a big yellow bus with buttons on the side. The buttons looked like the shapes he'd seen across the pages of books: letters. He stopped walking, Hal stopping with him as James reached out with his free hand and pushed one of the buttons.  
"G says 'ja-ja'! Goooooo G!" The machine said. James smiled, hitting another button. "P says 'pa-pa'! Play with the letter P!" He let out a light laugh, looking up at Hal to see if it was okay. Hal nodded and James pulled it off the shelf, running to put it in the cart.

"We should pick up a few more books, too." Hal whispered to John who nodded.

John pulled a few other toys off the shelf, including a small toy tool set for him and wheeled off to the book isle where they got a few more Clifford books and one with a brown bear dressed in overalls on the cover called Corduroy.

They went to check out, then piled it into the car. Hal strapped James in as John unloaded the cart and returned it, returning to start the car and drive off.

They were home quickly, unloading the car and carrying it to James's room. The boy watched at the two men brought in the bags and sat them on the floor of his room. When everything was in, they started to pull things out of bags and put it away.

James watched as they put his new clothes into his closet and dresser, then put the new toys in a corner of his room, finally putting his new books on the shelf. 

"Alright bud, do you need anything else?" James nodded no, and the men smiled before they walked out, leaving him to play with his new things.

James ran over to the pile of toys and pulled out the bus. He pushed a button and it went off again. James's eyes darted over to the shelf where his books say in neat lines. He pulled a book off and opened it up, setting it and the bus between his legs. He picked one set of letters and tried to find the first one from the word on his bus. 

"S says 'ss-ss'! Say S!" 

"Ss," James said lightly. He found the next letter and pushed the button.

"A says 'Ah or eh'! Amazing A!"

"Ss-eh." James said, putting the two together.

"I says 'e or eye'! Incredible I!"

"Ss-eh-e." He had one more to go, and he quickly found the letter and pushed the button.

"D says 'duh-duh'! Dishing out D!"

"Ss-eh-e-duh." He said, over and over, looking at the word. He said it fast, then slow until he finally recognized the word. "Said!" He laughed loudly.

John and Hal were standing in the hall, watching as he went along. They looked from one another in joy. John meant to turn away to leave him to it, confidant in his boy's ability to figure it out, but hit the door lightly with his foot while turning instead. He cursed silently at himself. 

James turned around surprised, then pushed himself off the floor, running over to the men with his book swinging at his side. He held it upfront them to see as he said, very loudly, "Said!"

Hal smiled at the boy and crouched down. "Hey. That's really neat!" He said. "Good job!"

James smiled the biggest smile they had even seen on the boy's face. One that forced him to close his eyes as they rustled his hair.

"Why don't we read it together in the dinning room while Baba gets dinner ready?" John suggested. "You can read every time you see your word."

James nodded as they walked to the dining room, sitting down on the floor and waiting for Daddy to do the same. When John sat down, he opened the book to the first page and started reading.

Every time the word 'said' appeared, John would stop to let James say it, and then would continue. This kept on until Hal called for dinner and they had to stop to eat.

James ate a little more than he had previously, letting Hal feed him even after he felt like he couldn't eat much more. 

Hal was happy that he didn't push away after the first few bites, letting the older man feed him most of his plate before he shook his head to indicate he couldn't eat more.

His belly full of food, they sat down on the couch to watch a movie. John had grabbed a blanket to cover him up during the show and James was out in no time at all.


	9. Chapter 9

A few days later, James as ridding in a train going down the tracks fast. He could feel the wind on his face as he stuck his head out the window and looked at the hills around him. It was a wonderful sight, James having to close his eyes so he wasn't too taken over by it. He pulled his head back in the window, and there at his Daddy and Baba. They were both reading books that sat between their legs.

James climbed down from his seat to go and sit next to his Daddy. But when he got close, the man stood up, walking away from James. 

"Da'dah!" He cried out, his brow tight. He looked over and saw Hal get up and walk off too. "Baba!"

He ran out of their room and after the two men. All of the sunshine from before was gone, replaced with gray clouds in the sky, angry as they loomed over.

James was suddenly very scared, being alone on the train planting a seed of panic in him tummy. He cried out for his daddy and baba, but neither of them were around. James feel to his knees, his legs hurting from running so much.

Then a man loomed over him. His face was hidden by shadows, but his leer shined perfectly clear. 

James screamed, trying to get away but finding his arms and legs were tied down buy some unknow force. He flailed as hard as he could but nothing could stop the man as he came closer.

He could hear himself screaming as tears feel down his face and a soft voice whispering into his ear.

"It's okay, it's okay, it's okay." Over and over again.

James flailed once more before his eyes opened to the gray of someone's shirt.

He was breathing heavy, John rocking back and forth. James felt his body far away, even though he knew he was in John's arms.

Hal was rubbing his back lightly, trying to calm him down as John rocked him. "It was just a dream, bear. Just a dream. We're right here, we got you." He whispered.

James nodded, his face wet as tears streamed down his flush face. John sat him back to look at his face. 

"You alright, buddy?" He asked, looking over the boy's face. James didn't respond, so John took it to mean no. "Well, how about your ears?" He asked. "Do you have two of those?"

Hal smiled, realizing right away what John was doing and going along. Hal grabbed onto the boy's eats lightly, saying, "Yup, he's got two of those."

"What about eyes?" John said, repositioning the boy in his lap to he was facing Hal as well..  
Hal moved around a little, even going to the extent of squinting his eyes before saying, "Yup, two of those as well." He said, tapping lightly on the boy's face.

James smiled a bit through tears.

"And what about toes, my good sir?" John asked, grabbing an accent from several different countries.

"Hum, I'm not sure. We'll have to count!" And so they did, counting each one until they got to ten.

James didn't know that this silliness had a purpose, one that Carson had told them bout a few days before. It's what he called a grounding technique, used to help people with panic attacks. Carson thought they could use if after they told him about James's frequent nightmares.

"Yes sir, all ten, right here!" Hal replied, saluting.

James smiled again, his heartbeat slowing as he took in the warmth of the room and his Daddy's sent. 

"Yup, all seems good to me." John smiled at the boy, noticing he was calming down. John pulled him in close for a hug, wrapping the boy in his arms. "Everything's just great." He said lightly.

John smiled over at Hal as the boy leaned in more, comforted but the embrace.

John then got up and handed James off to Hal, where he once again snuggled into his Baba's hug. "I'll go start breakfast."

Hal nodded and watched as John walked out of the room.

~~~

That afternoon, James sat in his room, the morning events forgotten as he played with a tool set, going around and saying he was going to fix that or fix this. He was happy doing simply this, taking the plastic screwdriver to his bed, first, then the couch, then one of the desks in the office. Hal watched as he folded laundry as James fixed just about everything in the house.

"Why don't we go read a book?" John asked, as the boy ran by for the sixth time. James sat down his tool set and ran off to his room to go pick a book.

John followed behind, taking the book that James held out asking, "This one, bud?"

James nodded and sat down in the floor, John sitting across from him. "Alrighty, let's read."

He started into the book the normal way of reading the book and then putting it down the letting him see pictures and helping the book go on at a steady rate. John thought nothing of it when the boy started wiggling around as the story went on. He did it often enough due to some kind of what John had thought of as ADD. But when James came closer to the book and John, then pushed his head under the book and into John's lap, John had to keep himself from laughing. The boy was staring intently at the book, showing that he wasn't doing this just to play. John continued the book as the boy's green eyes scared the page from the weird angle. 

James still didn't think he could see enough, so he pushed into his Daddy's lap more, his back now against the older man's knees. 

John tried not to laugh once more, the boy's positions clearly not the most comfortable thing in the world, but not seeming to care. Finally, when this position was, too, not clear enough, James moved up more, now sitting completely his Daddy's lap.

John didn't react, unsure of when get of not he should. Instead, he continued the story James sitting happily in his lap.

When the book was over, James turned it over and had John read it again. John did as he was asked, happy to help. After the second time finishing it, James shifted his weight in John's lap, unsure of whether or not he should ask his Daddy to read the book again.

"Do you want me to read it again?" John asked, understanding the boy's apprehension.  
James nodded yes, happy that the man suggested it so he didn't have to ask again. John went through the book once more before James took it out of John's hands and crawled out of his lap and over to the corner.

John smiled, taking that as his queue to leave. He got up to walk off, going first on his knees and then getting to his feet. He walked out and back to Hal who sat in the living room.

"You'll never believe what just happened." John said, still rejoicing.

Hal looked up from his book that sat in his lap as he sat on the couch cross legged. "What?"

"James just crawled into my lap." John took a seat next to Hal, putting a hand on his partner's leg.

"Really?" Hal asked, "Well, come on, spill! Tell me everything!" 

John had a large grin on his face as he told the man about just reading the book when James wiggled his way into his lap.

"What did you do?" Hal asked, his book forgotten as it sat on the floor.

"Nothing. I didn't think I should make it a big thing. I didn't want him to be scared or something." John replied.

Hal's face was glowing with happiness. "That was probably a good thing. I'll ask Carson and see what he thinks about it." A small tear ran down a face and Hal rushed to wipe it away.

"Why the tear?" John said, taking the man's face in his hand.

"It's just, I'm so happy he's feeling more at home. That he's comfortable here." Hal leaned into the touch, covering John's hand with his own. "We're finally a family."


	10. Chapter 10

James was running around the house, his feet moving faster than the rest of him as he feel onto his stomach. He bounced back up before Daddy or Baba could even ask him if he was okay, taking off once more.

"Wo, there bud." Baba said, lifting a basket full of laundry before the boy could crash into it. Hal watched as he ran into his room, only to come out a second later and run into his Daddy and Baba's.

Hal walked down stairs, passing John who was in the kitchen cooking before going into the laundry room. "We're going to have to do something about that." Hal shouted at John from the laundry room.

They stopped what they were doing for a second as feet pounded on the floor once more, then stopped.

"I was thinking the same thing." John said, pausing what he was doing in the kitchen to come in to small room as Hal loaded the washing machine. "Maybe we should take him outside. But I'm worried about the cold."

"Well, he's always been a bit of a busy body, maybe we can find something for him to do in here when the weather isn't so nice." Hal said, sighing. 

"I'll see if I can't find any recommendations online." John walked back to the kitchen to finish up what he was making.

James ran into his room again, smiling as he feel onto his pile of stuffed things. It was fun, being in a house that didn't get mad when he couldn't sit still. 

He was used to people telling his to shut up and sit still, then hitting him when he couldn't. His legs often had a different mind that him when waves of energy hit, causing him to run around.

As James peeled himself away from his pile of animals, he got up to his feet and ran towards the stairs, walking carefully down them and popping out in the kitchen.

"Hey, bear." John smiled over at him. "You hungry?"

James shook his head no, then ran off to the living room. John followed behind, just to see what he was up to. When James saw his Daddy out of the corner of his eye, he let out a laugh and ran behind the couch.

John smiled and chased after him, wrapping his hands around the boy's thin waist and pulling him back. James giggled and wiggled around as John tickled him lightly, then picked him up and walked him over to the table, where John strapped him in.

James wiggled more, but didn't resist and John called Hal in for lunch. Hal came out of the office, rustling the boy's hair before sitting down and digging in.

James let John feed him, but couldn't stop moving, whether it was swinging his legs to and fro or his head, his arms just wiggling up and down.

"Someone's a little energetic today." John commented. Hal gave him a small side smile as John tried, and failed, to keep the food off James's clothes.

When lunch was over, James ran off into the living room as Hal and John sat in simi-silence. "We have got to kill some of that energy." Hal said.

"Well, we can't just tell him to stop. That's not how it works." John said. "We have to give him something productive to do. That's what the people said online."

"Alright, I'll see what I can dig up." Hal said, standing up.

John nodded, going in to check on the boy. James sat at the coffee table, bouncing up and down on his knees as he reached around to put blocks together. John reached down and poked the boy's diaper, feeling it squish with the pressure. He sighed, starting to notice that James had stopped telling them when he needed to be changed.

John picked the boy up and walked back to his room to change him, making sure to powder him well to prevent a rash before strapping him into a new one. The whole time, James squirmed around, even after John had given him his bear. When he was finally diapered, he got up and took off before John could get his pants on.

He laughed, taking off into Daddy's room and climbing on their big bed.

Hal heard the ruckus and made his way upstairs as John chased the energetic boy down. "What's going on up here?" He asked, finding both his boys in their bedroom.

"Daddy gonna get me!" James screamed happily, crawling closer to the headboard. 

John smiled, plopping loudly onto the bed and reaching out for the boy.

Hal joined in, sitting down on the bed lifting James into his lap. "Why don't you have any pants on?" He laughed.

"Ran off 'for I could get 'em on him." John said, his head leaned back as he laid down. Hal had noticed a long time ago that John's southern draw had a way of coming out when he was tired. John tried as hard as he could to push away his roots, but they always had a way of popping up before he could stop them.

"Why don't we go read a book, hum? You always love that." Hal suggested to James.

James noises his head at the aspect of something new and wiggled out of his Baba's arms to run of to his room and find one.

"That boy," John sighed.

"We'll go read a book. You stay here and rest. I can see the day's take a bit out of you." Hal leaned down and gave his partner an upside down kiss before following James.

The boy was still searching through his bookshelf when Hal walked in and sat down on the floor in his usual place. To his surprise, James didn't even hesitate as he sat down in Hal's lap and handed him the book.

Hal smiled, giving the boy a light hug before starting the book. It was the bear book they had pulled of the shelf on a whim on their shopping exposé a few weeks back. Corduroy was clearly his favorite book, which made sense due to the fact that the bear reminded him a bit of James.

James followed along, seeing if the letters on the page matched up with anything he knew. It didn't, of course, it never did. But that didn't mean he didn't try. Hal and James had started pointing to each word as they read, helping James follow, but they didn't know what to do beyond that. 

The boy clearly liked books, and wanted to know how to read, but he had yet to ask for help getting there. Carson had recommended they let him come to them instead of just doing it.  
"It'll help with his communication problems." He had said. "He doesn't really know how to ask for things, and you all just giving it to him won't do anything but make him think it's alright not to ask; that you'll just figure it out eventually."

So, they did as much as they could without actually doing anything. James seemed to enjoy it enough as he bounced in Hal's lap, his energy still high.

Eventually, even his favorite book couldn't tame him as he wiggled out of Hal's lap and ran to his toys. Hal sighed, getting up to put the book away. Today was just one of his very short attention span days. 

"Hey bear, why don't we get dressed and go outside?" Hal asked, resorting to last measures at this point.

"Can we pwa' game?" James asked, setting down his toy.

"Yeah, 'course." Hal said. He walked over to the closet and pulled out James's jacket and a pair of boots. He dressed the boy quickly, they walked out the back door into their large span of a yard.

James immediately took off, running for the fence line. Hal was surprised at how fast the boy seemed to move. He seems so carefree, like all the things he had on his mind before were gone and all he had left was this single moment of joy. Hal found his face turning with a smile as the boy turned around and ran back, running right into Hal.

Hal let out an "oof" as James nearly tackled him, but stayed straight and wrapped his arms around the boy.

"Race you to the post." Hal said to the boy's upturned face.

"Your gon'na lose!" James laughed, taking off. Hal followed closely behind, letting the boy win.

James let out a giggle, his face red. Hal was breathing heavily, happy that James was happy.

Hal let James run around some more, amazed at how he would stop and look at the flowers (which were really just nice looking weeds), getting his face low to the ground before jumping back up to look at the next patch of things. His eyes were wide the whole time, enjoying the winter air and his new found freedom.

It was a goo hour before James was called back inside due to Hal shaking in his boots after having to stand in the cold for so long. James ran right up and took Hal's hand to be guiding back inside and to the bathtub before dinner.

His energy form before wearing off, James let Hal pull off his clothes and set him in the tub without too much resistance. James splashed around, getting Hal wet at he dove a toy boat into the water.

"Hey, bear. Let's not splash too much, okay?" Hal recommended as he washed the boy's hair.  
"So'wy." James said, letting the boat fall in from a smaller height. It still slashed, but so long as it didn't get Hal wet, he was okay.

When they boy was fully clean, Hal wrapped him in a towel and dried him off, then helped him into a fresh diaper and a thick footie to fight against the chills.

Once dressed and happy, they walked downstairs to eat. John had made tacos for Hal and him, then a soft tortilla with cheese for James.

James ate small bites sat the men talked about what they'd found.

"One sight said a v-i-d-e-o game might help." John said. They'd taken to spelling words they didn't want James to recognize, and, though James was curious, he never asked what they were. "Keep his Ming busy."

"Well, I'm sure it would, right up until it liquefied and fell out his ear." Hal said, not liking video games at all. "Maybe he could color or draw?"

"Tried that, remember? He was good for about five minutes before he started losing interest and coloring on the walls instead." John said. "What about something more physical? Like ridding a bike or something?"

"Which would be great if it wasn't the middle of winter." Hal sighed. "What if the only way we can handle this is with-"

"No." John said. He looked over at the boy who was still too occupied with his food to follow along to their conversation. "We can do this. What about something that'll change with his interests?"

"Like what?" Hal asked.

"Well, I read somewhere that L-E-G-O-S were really good because the kids can do what they want, change it up, you know?" John said. "Even just plain blocks could help."

Hal lifted an eyebrow. "You think it will work?"

John shrugged. "Worth a shot. And if it doesn't, we'll try something else. And we'll keep trying until we find something that works."


	11. Chapter 11

After dinner, James had calmed enough to sit on the couch and watch a movie with his Baba, snuggling next to him with a blanket around his shoulders, pulled up to his chin. Hal rubbed the boy's back lightly, noticing that James's eyes got heavy and he was already drifting off.

"He calmed down a bit." John said, handing Hal a cup of tea.

"Yeah, didn't see that part coming." Hal laughed.

"Maybe it was just an active day. Could help him sleep through the night?" John sat down next to Hal and leaned on his shoulder.

"That would be nice. But I think he's wet. We'll have to wake him to change him." Hal sighed, rubbing the sleeping boy's head.

"Let him sleep for a little more and then I'll change him." John adjusted his position, pulling his legs under him and sitting cross legged. "He looks so peaceful. Bit of a difference form today."

"Yeah." Hal laughed.

"Come on, let's get to bed." John said, picking the boy up from Hal's arms and walking with him to his room. He didn't wake when John changed him, surprising both his Daddy and Baba as they laid him down to bed, tucking him in and turning on a night light before closing the door.

Hal let out a sigh as John laid down. John put his arm out and grabbed Hal's hand, squeezing tightly before closing his eyes and drifting off almost immediately.

They woke up to the baby monitor going off a few hours later, the sound of whimpering coming through with static.

James couldn't find a comfortable position, everything running on him the wrong way. He tried to pull his arm out of his sleeve, failing and getting caught halfway, unable to push his arm back through or pull it out. He squealed, rolling around and wrapping the blanket around himself making it worse.

John walked in to see the boy, picking him up gently. "What's going on here, bear?" He asked, helping the boy push his arm through.

James cried out as his arm was righted, the fabric irritating his skin still. He wiggled around in his Daddy's arms, throwing his head back and trying to restrict his body to get out of the clothing.

John unzipped the footie, trying as hard as he could to take the thing off without hurting the boy. When he could, he pulled off the footie and tossed it to the floor.

James stopes squirming, but only enough for John to get a better grip on the boy. "What wrong? What hurts?" He asked.

"It huwts!" James cried out.

John didn't know what the boy was talking about until Hal came in, turning on the lights. James's body was covered in patches of red rash, all the way from his neck down.

"What happened?" Hal asked, running over to get a closer look.

"Must have been caused by the footie." John said. "He was crying to get out of it."

"This does not look good," Hal said. "Do we still have that cream from when you got poison ivy?"

"In the medicine cabinet, yeah, I think so." John said, bobbing up and down as James cried against his chest. His skin was irritated by the man's hold on him, but he didn't want to be put down.

Hal came rushing back in with a bottle of cream and started spreading it on the boy's back.

John could feel the boy tense up as Hal worked the cream over his back. "Gentle, he's not used to this." John mouthed over at Hal.

Hal nodded, forgetting that the boy was still nervous about being touched when he didn't initiate it.

James had to close his eyes tight and push his head in between John's arm and chest to keep from freaking out. Hal hated seeing the boy so tense, but the cream needed to get onto his skin and the boy wasn't capable of doing it all himself. So he started signing, only humming at first, a song his mom used to sing to him when he had trouble sleeping. He had forgotten most of the words, but hummed the melody as best he could.  
John picked up on it right away, recognizing the notes and adding lyrics.

 

You are my sunshine,  
My only sunshine,  
You make me happy when sky's are gray.  
You'll never know, dear,  
how much I love you.  
Please don't take my sunshine away.

 

The sang it through five times before James relaxed a bit, releasing a whit knuckle grip he didn't know he had on John's shirt.

"I need to do his front." Hal mouthed to John.

John nodded and pulled the boy away from himself to turn the boy around. James didn't like being in nothing but his diaper, the breeze starting to blow on his smothered back and shoulders, sending a chill down his spine.

"Let's finish up quickly, okay. Then we can snuggle in our bed. Nice and warm, does that sound good bear?" Hal said, rubbing down the last of the boy's chest and then nodding up at John to start walking the boy to their room.

James was sat down on the eyes on their bed, his eyes half open and his body heavy. Hal brought in a different pair of clothes, ones that James hadn't worn in a while.

"Just in case it's the detergent or something. Hit all our bases." Hal told John. 

"Probably a good thought." John said, helping Hal put the clothes on the unresponsive boy. He was already nodding off, John having to catch him before he fell off the bed.

"Wo, there bear. Stay away just for a minute more until we can get you dressed." John said, pushing the boy back into a seated position.

James didn't want to stay awake. He was tired and he hurt all over and the cream smelled like mint and was cold and he didn't like any of it. Before he could say so, though, Hal took the boy in his arms and pulled him up the bed and rested his head on a pillow, tucking him in.

James was happy for the release, but it just didn't feel right. He reached out a hand, whimpering as he searched. John felt the boy's hand searching around for something and took hold of it, pulling him close and wrapping his arms around the boy.

James fell into the embrace, the rash and smell from before forgotten as he feel asleep.


	12. Chapter 12

The next day, John and Hal were surprised by a visit from Carson.

"Hey man, didn't know you were coming over." Hal smiled, inviting his friend in.

"Ah, yeah, sorry for the surprise visit." Carson kicked off his shoes and draped his coat over one of the chairs.

"No, actually, we were going to call you about some things." Hal said.

"Yeah, I also have some things that I thought you two might want to hear." Carson said, pulling a suit case to his chest to show the man.

Hal's eyes furrowed as James ran in a smiled on his face until he saw Carson and Hal standing in the entrance way with serious faces.

Carson grabbed a smiles as fast as he could. "What's up, Jay?" 

James looked from one man to the other, trying to judge the situation before giving up and running off.

"He's active." Carson said. "Lot different from the last time I saw him in person."

"Oh yeah." Hal chuckled. "That's one of the things I wanted to talk about. But that's for later. You hungry?"

"Always!" Carson laughed, following Hal into the kitchen where John stood cooking, James sitting at his feet with a pot and spoon.

"Oh, hey, I thought I heard someone come in." John said, wiping his hands on his apron before shanking hands. "What's up?"

"Just stopping by, saying hi." Carson smiled. He looked down at James, making sure he wasn't looking when he mouthed, "After lunch."

John nodded. "Cool. I'm making hot dogs and Mac and cheese. Always the finest in our house." He laughed.

"Hey, better than the stuff they serve at the slop house." Carson chucked. "At least here, you know what's in the hot dogs."

James looked up as the men laughed. He held his arms out to be picked up by Hal, who happily obliged. He sat the boy down on the island , away from the stove by close to the conversation.

"So, Jay, how have you been?" Carson asked.

James smiled, looking over at John and Hal as they leaned over the pot on the stove.

Carson smiled back, reading the boy's body language and saving it for later. "Been doing lots of fun stuff?" He asked.

James nodded. "Drums!" He pointed down at the pot and spoon. "And mo'ie an' book an' be'r an' car an' crawoon an' game!" 

Hal turned around as the boy talked.

"Keeping busy?" Carson said, looking over at Hal, who nodded.

They ate lunch with music playing in the background, which was weird for Carson, but the other two men didn't seem to mind it as they feed James. When lunch was over, James picked out a movie and sat down on the couch with a coloring book.

John walked back over to the table and sat down, ready for whatever Carson had for them.

"Before I start, I want you all to tell me what you want to know first." Carson said.

"Ah, well, uh, first things first, last night. He woke up with a giant rash. Any idea what from?" Hal asked.

"Well, from what I could see in his medical files, no. But it could just be his clothes. What was he wearing?" Carson asked.

"Uh, a new footie we got him from the mall a few days ago. Where did you get his medical files?" John asked.

Carson sighed. "I asked a friend from the social services to pull it out for me for... Something."  
"What something?" John asked, eyebrows kitted tight. 

"I told one of the officers I know to tell me if they found anything about an assault on a kid from a month or so ago." 

"You mean when James was mugged?" Hal asked.

"Yeah. Just to see if anything came up." Carson said. "And a guy that owns a grocery store was going through his sevaliance footage before deleting it and found the whole thing. He turned it into the police and they found the two guys. What they didn't know, was who the kid was."

Carson looked up at the two men who were clearly holding their breath.

"I asked for the medical file to see if I should tell them who it was. If James would be ready to face it. And, I found some things that you will want to know."

"What is it, did he hurt someone?" Hal asked, thinking the worse.

"No, no, no. He never hurt anyone. What I found was six homes from the time he was thrown into the system when he was two, to when he was four. All of them saying 'too wild', 'won't stay still', 'doesn't listen', and such." Carson said. "After that, we see another pattern: 'won't participate', 'doesn't respond to correctional words', things that make it sound like every one it trying to control him. One even went as far as recommending he get tested for ADD before sending him off to the next house." Carson flipped around a few pages, spinning them around so Hal and John could see.

"This is what we're starting to see," John said, more to Hal than Carson. "That was one the wall yesterday, that's one of the things we wanted to talk to you about."

"Yeah, so we see this for another year or two until he's about six or seven. This is when we start seeing that he just stops talking. No reason in the file why, but this is clearly when he's beatings got to the breaking point. Before, judging by his hospital records, the beating were lifted, resulting in fractures and sprains at worse.

"At this point is when we see full breaks of multiple bones, and it gets worse and worse, home after home until he finally runs away at the age of sixteen.

"The cops pick him up trying to catch a bus to New Hampshire, a take him back to his foster parents who keep him for another two weeks before they ship him off to the next home. Now, instead of the change every four or five months, it's two or three, with him running away from every single one until he was 17 and finally won, jumping off the grid until you found him."

"They just.. Stopped looking?" John asked, horrified.

"He was an attempted runaway on several occasions. When he turned 18, he wasn't the state's problem anymore. They had lots of other kids to care for. And 18 year old runaway didn't really take the top of the to-do list." Carson replied honestly. "But, that's when everything stops. He never got in trouble, he'd been know to report people to the police when he could. He was a good kid. Known for not stealing anything if he could get it honestly."

"Okay, now even in lost." Hal said. "What are you trying to tell us."

"What I'm saying is that this kid was made to look like the worst of the worst, but no one would give him a chance. If the defense gets a hold of that, they're going to twist it to look like it was all Jay's fault he was mugged. And, even though Jay isn't the only one who's been called to the stand, they're going to pick him out as the small and weak one."

"There are other people who can testify?" Hal asked.

"Yeah, once the police brought the boys in, a few of their victims came forth." Carson said. "They have a strong case, but Jay's is the only one caught of film. He'll have to testify to put these guys in jail.

"So, what do you think we should do?" John asked, clearly angered by the whole situation.

"I think you should do what James what's to do." Carson said after a long pause.

Both men took in a large breath of air to think.


	13. Chapter 13

James was watching the movie, content with a coloring book until his attention was drawn away by nothing under the coffee table. James set his book and crayons aside, wiggling out of his blanket and slipping into the floor. He crawled under the coffee table and reached for a sippy cup lid. 

The find was sort of a let down and he crawled back and sat the lid on the table. He wondered where the rest of the cup was as his head started to twist around looking under everything until he could see the cup under the couch. It must have rolled under there somehow.

He crawled under the couch, pushing close to the floor until his hand could wrap around the cup's lip. He tried to push himself back, but found he was stuck.

He pushed harder as his heart raced. Small spaces made him feel safe asking as he knew he could get out of them. But now, he could feel his hot breath blowing back in his face as he wiggled around, trying to kick himself free.

The panic set in, soaking his diaper as he cried out. "Daddy! Baba!" He screamed as loud as he could.

John and Hal were still sitting in the kitchen when they heard the boy's yell out. They were on their feet in seconds, running towards the living room. Hal could see the boy's feet as he kicked furiously.

"He's under the couch!" Hal yelled over to John who quickly grabbed one of the arms and lifted the couch up enough for Hal to grab James's hands and pull him from under the couch.

Hal pulled the boy in close as he cried and wrapped his arms around the small figure of the boy. James grabbed fistfuls of Hal's shirt, taking in the man's sent with every gasping breath.

"You're okay, bear. You're okay." Hal whispered into James's ear.

When James calmed down, John took the boy to his room to change his diaper. James didn't have much energy left in him, so he reached up to John until the man lifted him up. James leaned his head against his Daddy's chest as they walked back downstairs. Carson and Hal sat in the kitchen at the island looking gloomy.

"You doing alright, bud?" Hal asked, his face tight with concern as he rustled the boy's light blond curls.

James nodded. "I'm 'kay." He said.

"That's good." Carson smiled. 

"Hey, bud, we have something very serious that we need to talk about." Hal said.

James could hear the intecity of the man's voice and he pushed back from John's chest, sitting up more straight. John sat him down on the counter and kept and hand on his back as he turned around to look at the men.

"Do you remember when you first came here and Carson had to look at your owies because two people had hurt you really bad?" Hal asked.

James nodded his head slowly, keeping his eyes fixed on Hal's face.

"Well, the police officers found those bad guys that hurt you and they're asking for you to help them put them away so they can't hurt anyone else." Hal didn't let go fo his eye contact with the boy, even after James's eye darted to his hands. "Do you understand what I'm saying?"

James nodded. "If I gow an' help da powice, den dose guys can't hurt no on' else, wight?" He asked.

Hal put a hand on James's knee. "Not if you go, bear. But if you don't, there's a chance they could." Hal didn't want to lie, he wanted to make sure Jay had all the facts before he made his decision.

"You don't have to, okay. We can fight this if you don't want to ever see those people again. We'll support you either way." John said from behind him.

James nodded once more, twirling his fingers in thought. He didn't want to ever see those two people again. But he also didn't want them to hurt anyone else. He just couldn't choose which one was more important though.


	14. Chapter 14

That night, James didn't sleep at all. He sat in bed, continually pushing the button on his bear to light its stomach. He didn't want to sit in the dark, not now. His stomach was in knots too much to eat, even after John and Hal encouraged him to do so.

He stopped talking for the night, not too unusual for him, but still not a good sign when coupled with the fact he wouldn't eat. John and Hal passed side glances every time the boy did something out of the normal. 

After they put him to bed, they were having serious questions as the whether or not it was a good idea to bring up the trial.

The next whole day, James was in a bad mood. He still would eat, even after John made his favorite eggs with ham. He didn't talk and seemed to whine more than anything else. Everything seemed to set him off, the clothes he was wearing were too hot, and when he tried to get them off, he got stuck until Hal pulled it off. They gave up on trying to keep him dressed after the third shirt and second pair of pants.

"What is this about?" John asked, picking up the third and final shirt he'd shoved off. 

"I don't know. Should we call Carson?" Hal asked, already grabbing his cell.

They heard something heavy fall, and John nodded yes before running off to see what it was.

"Carson!" Hal exclaimed as the other line came through.

"Hal, what's up man? This bout Jay?" He asked.

"The one and only." Hal heard the man chuckle through the phone. "So, after you left last night James has been acting very... Weird. He doesn't want to wear clothes, hasn't touched a crum of food, can't sit still what so ever, which I understand is caused by something else, but this is different than when he's running from room to room. It's like he's just not comfortable what-so-ever."

"Well," Carson sighed, "This is a big decision we sat in front of him. He might just be having a hard time deciding. It would explain the uncomfortableness you were talking about. His inability to choose at this moment is manifesting physically and not letting him be himself. Jut give it time and hold your patience. The last thing he's going to need right now is you two getting on him for something simple. 

"He trusts you so completely he's not trying to behave all the time anymore, that's what you all see when he can't sit still normally. You two are probably the first people who haven't yelled at him for running around like he does. Take it slow, It'll be fine once he decides."

Hal heard another loud sound from the other room and looked up, twisting his head to see if he could see anything. "Thanks. Sorry to call and dash, but I'm pretty sure something loud and breakable just fell and I have to see what it is. Call you back if I have any other questions."

"Anytime, man."

Hal hung up and ran to the other room where John had a hold of one of the boy's hands as he tried to get away. "What's going on?" He asked, eyes wide.

"He's--ah!" John started, then yelled out as James's teeth sunk into his skin. John let go and the boy ran off for a corner, when he started bashing his head against the wall. "He's doing that."

Hal took a deep breath, trying to follow Carson's advice before addressing the boy. He went over and grabbed the boy in his arms, trying to hold him down so he couldn't hurt himself anymore.

James wiggled and flailed as much as he could, trying to get away. He whined when it didn't work, squealing from the back of his throat. He only broke through Hal's arms by shifting his weight and pushing hard on the man's chest.

Hal couldn't stand the pressure on his abdomen and his fingers lost their grip, the boy breaking free and running for it.

John had to stop himself from laughing as James ran for the stairs in nothing but his diaper and started to crawl up them. Instead, he ran after the boy, trying to catch up to him before he could do any serious damage.

Tears rushed down James's face as he ran for his room and buried himself in his stuffed animals. He didn't want to be touched, he didn't any to be held, he didn't want to wear clothes, he didn't want to eat, he just wanted to sit here and be left alone!

John knew he'd run into his room and followed him, stopping at the door as he saw the boy laying on top of the stuffed animals Hal and John had gotten him a while ago. James had happily organized them by size and color, each time setting them up so he could see all their faces.

"Hey bear." John said, letting the adrenaline from before work its way out of his system before he sat down. "Bear, what's wrong, huh? Can't you tell Daddy?" John put a hand in the boy's knee as he sat down.

James closed his eyes tight and tried to push the man out of his mind. He whined for the man to go away, but John didn't listen.

"You can tell us anything, bear. Anything. We won't be mad, we promise, right Hal?" John brought his partner into it the second he walked in the room.

"Of course. We will always love you, bear." Hal kneeled down next to the piled of stuffed things and rubbed the boy's head.

James couldn't hold it in anymore. "I wan'a be weft awone!" He cried out.

John and Hal knew right away that wasn't the real problem, so the probed for more answers. "Why, buddy."

James just shook his head no time and time again until he said, "Dose pe'pol are bad, but I do' wan'a see dem! But I do' wan' dem to hurt no one else!" James cried. "Pe'pol huwt an' huwt an' huwt and dey ne'er 'et caugh'! I wan' dos men to go away fore'er!"

James was sitting up on the pile crying hard and loud. John and Hal recognized right away what he was talking about. After being hurt by so many people that he was supposed to trust and trying to get help, none of them ever got in trouble. Not a single one. And each time he had to put on a face that said nothing was wrong.

"Hey, bear, look at me." Hal said, waiting for the boy to open his eyes before he spoke again. "You don't have to pretend to be okay this time. This time, you can go up there and cry and wail and they have to listen. There's no need to pretend to be strong anymore, bear. If you want to go up there and tell the whole thing through tears, you can. No one's going to say you were weak. And if they do, well, you have two big and strong daddies who will make it so they never do again, okay."

James cried harder as Hal pulled him close. The long night with out sleep and the day following caught up with him as his sobs died down and turned into hick-up's. Once he was asleep, John grabbed James's favorites pj's and started to dress him before tucking him into bed.


	15. Chapter 15

The next day, Hal and John stood in an old office that smelled like stale coffee and cigarets, which was odd in this day and age. James held onto his feet stepped on each other. He looked down his shirt with his other hand in his pocket and stared at the floor. He didn't like this at all.

"Mr. Kennedy will see you now." A lady that looked like she was stuck in the 80's said from behind a desk.

Hal nodded and he lead their group into the small, cramped office. He shook hands with a man dressed in a twine suit behind a solid wood desk. "Hello." He greeted them. 

"'Morning," Hal and John said at the same time, taking his hand before sitting down.

"I assume you're here to talk about the Harrison and Tad case?" The lawyer asked. John nodded. "Thanks for coming in. We have a good chance of winning on this case. The two men are well off kids of 20 and 19 who come from decent families. They'd been suspect for several mugginess, robberies, and assaults, but no one ever had enough proof to put them away. The video that was turned in caught both their faces along with this man's." The lawyer gestured to James. "With his testimony, we should have this over in a week."

Hal nodded. "We'd been told there where others that came forth as well." He asked.

"Yes a few people have turned up, however, Mr. Fisher's will be the most valuable." He said, leaning back in his chair and crossing his hands. "He's the only one we have physical proof of."

This time, it was John's turn to speak. "So they're not getting called to the stand?"

"No, they will. All of them will back up the story that these two boys are violent and horrible people. Willing to steal a cup of change from a kid and beat him up just for the rush of it." The lawyer's eye brows were knitted tightly. He'd seen enough people get through this world without punishment, and if he can put even one of them away, the only thing that would stop him would be death. "Now, I have an understanding of your... Lifestyle choices, however, it will be hard for a jury to connect with something so... Obscure. I will request that you have on a nice shirt and tie and some slacks. Maybe some hair jell as well." He said, noticing the boy's curly blonde hair.

"We can do that." Hal said, understanding that their life wasn't a typical one. The looks that they got walking in had been odd, not violent or mean, more curious than anything, but James clearly didn't like it as he kept his face down the whole time.

"Good. Do you two have power of attorney over him?" Kennedy asked.

"Ah, no. We haven't really thought about it." John said, squeezing James's hands.

"Well, it may be a good thought to hold in the back of your head just in case. It would probably help in the case as well, making the boy look even more like a victim to the jury." Mr. Kennedy pulled out a few papers from his desk and handed them over to Hal. "It wouldn't take long to do. In the mean time, I have some questions to go over that the defense may ask."

"Thank you." Hal said, taking the papers. "I don't think that's the best idea with the questions right now." Hal eyed the boy who was clearly not comfortable at all in the tiny, cramped, cluttered office. His eyes were on the floor and his thumb in his mouth (a new habit James had picked up) as he looked down at his colorful shoes.

The lawyer nodded his head. "Okay, but they will pull out some nasty tricks to make him seem unreliable. I'll send you home with a few possible questions so that you all will be prepared, if that works."

"Yes, thank you." John said. "Is there anything else we to know?"

"I believe we have discussed everything we needed to. I want to thank you again for coming in." Mr. Kennedy stood up and walked around the desk, kneeling down to James's level before saying, "You're very brave to want to put those bad men away. I'm very grateful that you want to help."

James looked up at the man and nodded his head. The lawyer smiled, and tossed the boys hair before shaking hands with Hal and John before they left.

On their way out of the building, James held tight to John's hand, not realizing that his hand was white with the pressure as they made it to the car. James didn't want to let go, which both Hal and John saw as a bad sign. So John climbed in the back with James while Hal drove.

The boy was tense the whole way, his back stiff and eyes looked on the window.

Hal had cranked up the heat to fight off the cold, and John had pushed the boy to sit back in his seat, then onto his shoulder when he wouldn't. James pulled his feet up so his knees where at his chest as he leaned on his Daddy's shoulder, falling asleep without realizing it.

"He's out." John said lightly to Hal.

"This is going to be a very complicated experience." Hal sighed. "For all of us."


	16. Chapter 16

The next week was a great difficulty, as James was still not himself and they had to train him with the lawyer's questions. He couldn't sit still for more than ten minutes which created another problem. Hal sighed when he started noticing James's mind flittering away once more, deciding to cut their practice sessions into five minute segments.

"James, bud, one last question and then we can find something fun to do." Hal said as James's eyes focused back onto his Baba.

His green eyes shined bright in the light, his look meaning he was bored and didn't want to do this anymore.

"Why were you--hey--" Hal snapped as James started fading out again. "Okay, why were you on that street corner?"

"I wan' food!" James whined, impatient and not liking that they strapped him into his high chair so he couldn't run off.

"We'll eat after this, okay. Let's just answer the question." Hal pleaded.

"No, hun, I think that is his answer." John said, turning around from the stove and leaning on the island. "You were getting money to eat, right?"

James nodded, then wiggled more, seeing as he kept up his side of the deal and not wanting to be asked any more questions.

Hal sighed once more. "Alright, but you're going to have to tell them that. I'll take it for now, though. You're free to go." With that, Hal in buckled the wiggling boy and sat him down on the floor.

He was in a sweater and overalls to keep him warm, but also hindered his movement a small amount. Enough for Hal or John to catch him a littler quicker if he decided to run off. 

James took off for the living room, where he sat on the couch and bounced lightly, his mind running at a thousand mile a minute and unable to focus on anything that he normally liked to do like coloring.

"What are we going to do, the trial is in two days and he has no idea what he's in for." Hal asked, face right with concern as he got up to stand closer to his other half.

"Have a little confidence in the boy." John laughed, putting a hand on Hal's shoulder. "He's a smart kid, he'll be fine.

Hal sighed again. "Yeah, I'm just worried. We have so many questions to go over tomorrow."

"How about," John smiled at Hal, "instead of questions, we go get ice cream and let him run crazy in the back yard and play some games and do as much as we can and just let him decide what he wants to do and have some fun instead of stressing him out."

Hal looked over at John like he just grew a second head.

"Hear me out," John laughed. "He will stress himself out enough without us adding to it. Let's just have some fun and put him in a good mind set before the trial instead of stressing with him."

Hal closed his eyes in thought. "He'd enjoy it much better." He smiled, and stretched his head out to see into the living room as James's head glanced around the room with new found energy. "And he'd probably be able to focus more if we killed some of that energy."

John smiled and patted the man's back. "Good thinking."

So, the next day, that's just what they did. First was a ride to the store where James picked out a new ball and dribbled it out to the car. Then was a scoop of ice cream from a local place, where John got chocolate, Hal got sherbet, and James got strawberry; two scoops. They ate it quickly, John having to finish was James didn't eat before they got to the car and headed home.

They went straight to the back yard, the ice cream already adding coal to the fire that fueled James's energy. With his new ball, he ran up and down the yard, kicking it and throwing it to both Hal and James, creating the best game of ball James had ever played.

Hal and John had a hard time keeping up as the boy laughed and darted around. He seemed totally back to himself, which made both men happy.

They were outside for several hours before anyone realized what time it was. Instead of throwing something together, they just ordered a pizza and ate it in the living room as they watched a new movie, James snuggled between his Daddy and Baba as it played.

It wasn't long until the ice cream lost its grip and he was slipping into sleep.

"Hey, bear." Hal smiled, pulling the small boy into his lap. "Let's go take a bath okay."

James nodded okay, but made no movement towards the bathroom. Hal let out a light laugh and John picked him up and sat him on the floor, mostly holding onto his hand to hold him up as they walked down the hall. 

James wasn't all there as the sat him down in the tub and washed him off, John having to hold him up as Hal washed him. When he was clean, John hauled him out of the water and Hal dried him off, both men helping him put on a night time diaper and a footie.

By this time, James could hardly keep his eyes open and was out the second his head hit the pillow. 

Hal tucked him in, pulling the planet up to his chin, knowing he'd be wrapped in it by morning due to his flailing while he slept. 

It was a great sight to see him just sleeping, his face muched against the pillow with a bear tucked under his arm. John kissed his head before they headed off to their room.

"Told you it was a good idea." Hal joked as they sat down on the side of the bed.

John smiled, "Best one you've had in a while." He leaned in a kissed Hal deeply.

Hal leaned into the kiss before John pulled away, putting his forehead on Hal's and sighing. 

"What's wrong?" Hal asked.

"Nothing." John said.

"Then why the sigh?" Hal grabbed John's hand tightly.

"It was such a perfect day. I don't want it to end." John looked Hal in the eyes a smiled.

Hal understood right away. "Well, the night is still young and the kids are asleep and the house is clean, so there really is only one thing left to do." He smiled.

John looked deep into Hal's eyes before leaning in for another kiss, this one deeper and more passionate. Hal feel into it, taking in every part of the man he loved as the kiss grew into more than just kisses.


	17. Chapter 17

The next day, Hal was the first one up, his body twisted in the sheets. He peeled them off and put clothes on before walking down the hall to check on James. The boy was still silently asleep in his crib, blankets rolled around him as he sprawled out on his back.

John came up behind him, placing a hand on Hal's shoulder before squeezing his head through to look at their boy.

"I don't want this day to happen." Hal said, brow tight.

"Every day happens," John said, "We only have the power to make the best of it." He kissed Hal's head before pushing him and placing a hand on James's back, rubbing it lightly. "Time to wake up, bud."

James opened his eyes a small amount, tubing over to his stomach for John to rub his back more. He always liked it when Daddy did that. John pulled his hand back, though, getting a moan of annoyance from James as he opened his eyes again to see both his Daddy and Baba standing in the doorway.

"Come on, bear, we have to get ready." Hal said.   
John lifted him up and sat him on the changing may as James rubbed some of the sleepiness from his eyes. John pulled off his footie and changed his diaper, replacing it with a thinner pull-up that wouldn't be noticed under regular clothes.

"We have to dress big today, okay bear." 

James nodded his head. He had already prepared himself for this yesterday, knowing he had to be big once more upsetting him, but not turning him away from the facts. He had to stop these guys from hurting someone else. He knew that from the second he'd been told about the trial.

He let John slip on his big boy underwear over a pull-up. "That way no one will think anything of it and you won't have a problem if you have an accident." John said, giving the boy a reassuring smile. He didn't think putting the boy in a pull-up would help him out of his head space, but if the boy wet his pants on the stand for any reason, it would be much worse.

James pushed the men out of his room to finish getting dressed on his own, feeling like that may help. It did, and by the time he had on his pants and clumsily worked his fingers around the buttons on his shirt, he felt like the same kid he'd been tree months ago. Like nothing had changed.

His was quite a sight as he came out of his room, his shirt lazily tucked in and buttoned the wrong way. Hal stepped in to help, fixing the small chiclets into place before helping him tuck in his shirt. "We'll have this over with soon, okay." He smiled at the boy once more. "Come on, let's get your jacket."

James nodded and walked to the closet where John pulled out a suit jacket they'd gotten him a few days ago at the mall. The lawyer had recommended that James be dressed nicely to make him less of a target and Hal and John were happy to oblige. They found a nice fitting suit and button up with a tie that fir the boy's size. Hal knotted the tie around the boy's neck, flipping his collars down. James had no idea how to do it, so he had to ask one of them. He hated that they were suffering because of him, but he was also happy to not be going through the this alone. He smiled at the men half heartedly in a thank you.

Hal put his hand on the boy's shoulder before he led their group to the car.

***

James sat on the stand, looking out to a gathering of people. The lawyer he'd meet only a few weeks ago sat at a table in front of him, a different man with slicked back black hair packing in front of the judge and jury. James could see the way the man smiled as he shifted in his seat.

"So, why were you on that street corner that night?" The defense attorney asked with a slick smile.

James swallowed a lump in his throat. No nerves, got to do this right, he though to himself. "I was corner sitting." 

"Now, just to clear it up for the jury, what does that mean?" The guy asked.

"It means I sit on the street and beg for money." James really didn't like this guy and his way of talking down to him.

"So, the money my clients allegedly stole was not even yours?" He got a smirk on his face that James wished he could knock right off.

Hal gripped John's hand tightly, seeing the boy getting frustrated and having no power to do anything about it really turning his stomach to knots.

"It was plenty mine." James felt his face go tight in anger. He took a breath before continuing. "When people put money in the cup, it's a sighing over. That money is then mine to buy food with. Which is what I was going to do before these two--men-- took it and beat me up."

The lawyer's face twisted tightly, barely enough to to notice, but enough for James to see he was getting to the man. "I've seen in a file that store owners don't like it much when people 'corner sit'. Did you not get yelled at only a few days prior to the alleged mugging by one of these men's father?"

"Wha-- how would I have even know that. Some guy just yelled at me to get the--crap--out of his store front and I ran. I would never have know that he was their father!" James was now sitting at the edge of his chair, unable to believe this shit spewing from the guy's mouth.

"But this was not the first time you had been shooed off by this man, was it? No, it's happen on numerous cases, once involving and officer that he to come down no remove you." The lawyer cocked an eye brow.

"That was be use I was so sick I could move! If you look if your file, you'll find that thy officer took me don to one of the shelter to go get help because I couldn't make it by myself." James's face twisted in her more, now uncle to hide it. He could feel his chest get tight. He knew he'd be attacked, the prosecuting attorney had said so himself, but he never thought it'd be like this.

"So you're saying that you weren't mad about it at all?" 

"Of course I was! But this trial isn't about me being mad! It's about two well off guys who stole the only money I had before kicking me into unconsciousness and running off. And not because they needed the money, no, but because it's pretty clear that their shoes cost more than most people's car, no, it was because they wanted the thrill of it. Their adrenaline junkies looking for their next hit. But instead of riding roller coasters of using their daddy's money for sky diving, they take things from people who have nothing." James was almost yelling, but kept himself contained enough to not be kicked out of court. "The real crime here should be that those people don't get to hit you as hard as you hit them."

James could see a few nodding heads in the courtroom, some of them even in the jury. People dressed in rags looked like they were about ready to jump out of their seats and cheer.

The lawyer glared at James before he said, "Thats all the questions I have, judge." And sitting down next to the two men.

James got a decent look at them now, their brown hair cut short on one guy and a little longer on the other, styled with more care then mattered. The looked more ready for a fashion show than court, both of their suits custom made with fine materials. Their faces where chiseled and handsome, but tight in frown as they realized this case may not be as easy a win as they thought. James hadn't been kidding about the shoes, both of them designer and custom fit. These boys were clearly the products of clean blood.

"We will break for two hours and then have closing statements." The judge said, slamming the tiny hammer on a wooden coaster and standing up. Every one stood up s he walked out, then gathered their things and headed for the door.

James jumped out of his seat and ran out of the courtroom as fast as he could. He didn't want to be here my ore. He didn't want to see them anymore. He didn't want my of this anymore. It was sickening and it hurt his head and stomach and he didn't like their questions.

John and Hal kept their eyes locked on the boy the whole time, watching as his face twisted between fear and anger as he spoke. They were now pushing past people as the boy ran out of court. "Get him!" Hal said to John, not needing to really say it, but still feeling and urge to say it. They saw as he turned left once out of court and ran for a bathroom.

"I'll go get the car, you bring him out." John said, patting Hal's shoulder before running out the front door to chase down their car.

James didn't care anymore, so he ran I into the bathroom and shut himself in one of the stalls. He kneeled over and finally let out a cry, the pain from his beating still fresh on his mind as if it had happened yesterday. He could hear the door to the bathroom open and someone walk in, but at that point he was hunched over against the wall between the toilet and the stall wall and didn't care. His sobs could easily be heard and he knew it and he didn't care. He just wanted to disappear.

Hal hoped he wouldn't see anything he shouldn't as he crouched down to look under the stall doors. He could hear James, but finding which one he was in would be a little difficult considering how the bathroom echoed the sound. Luckily, there were only three stall doors that were closed and only one of them didn't have just feet on the floor. He could see the boy folded in on himself on the floor. "James, hey, bear. Open the stall okay, let's go home." He said, trying to reach up to the latch.

James looked up, tears making calidascopes of his eyes, but he could clearly see someone was trying to get into the stall. He couldn't hear anything over his own sobs and pushed against the wall, kicking out with his feet. He screamed and kicked once more before whipping his eyes to see it wasn't one of those guys coming after him.

Hal was hit square in the face, causing him to recoil a bit before the boy's second blow could hit. "Bear, it's just me. Come on, let's get home. Come one." Hal said, ignoring the pain and finally reaching the latch enough to slide it to the side. The lock clicked before it swung open. Hal stood up and pulled the boy out of the corner. James clung onto Hal like a monkey as he was carried out of the courthouse. Hal I gnomes as people stared and walked him to the car that sat parked out front. It all happened so fast, James had almost forgotten about the trial. Almost. But what he cried about now wasn't the trial, no, that was just a part of it, and Hal and John knew it.

Josh drove home as Hal cradled James in his lap, not worried about his seatbelt at the moment. The boy shook lightly in the man's arms, unable to calm himself until the got home. James practically tore off his shirt, his jacket having been abandoned in the car. John held him as Hal worked his pants off and went to fetch something soft and warm, throwing a blanket over the boy in the mean time. He put the clothes into the dryer as he grabbed a diaper, returning to the living room with it all in hand. They made quick work of the change, James not letting go of John's hand the whole time as his eyes, red and puffy from crying, opened and closed. 

John picked him up the second the last button was hooked in place and sat down on the couch cradling him as much as he could as the boy sobbed, crying harder and longer than he ever had.

"It's not fair." He said after and hour and a half of just sitting there. "Year after year dey do bad things. And I tell dem, I did, but dey never believe me. Dey said I was bad! Dey said it was my fault! It wasn't my fault! But no one e'er believe me! I tired to be good but no one wiked me! I don't know what I did wrong!" His voice broke on the last word, sending a new wave of sobs.

"Ssh, ssh, ssh, bear. It's okay. It's okay. We believe you. We'll never let anyone hurt you again, okay. We promise." John wrapped him in a large hug and didn't let him go until his tears faded and he fell into and exhausted sleep.

"Do you think we should just let him sleep until he wakes up?" Hal asked, playing with the boy's hair lightly. "I don't want him to go hungry."

"Let him sleep as long as he likes. Then we can fest until he throws up." John half joked. That was his plan, minus the puking thing.

Hal nodded his head in agreement and smiled up at John.

"Why are you smiling?" John asked as he stood up with the boy and walked him to his room.

"I don't know. I just feel like... Like this is just the beginning of the beginning, you know. Like this could somehow bring us closer. Maybe even make us more." Hal sighed. "I know it sounds weird, it's just a feeling."

John stopped in the hall and kissed Hal square on the lips. "It doesn't sound weird. It sounds like the man I love is doing the his best to bring something good of this." He kissed him one more. "And that's why he is so amazing."

"Who have you been dating behind my back, huh?" Hal joked as they tucked James in. "He better be really hot if you're so found of him because this-" he flexes a bit. "-is not something left easily."

"Oh, he's the hottest thing you'll ever meet. And loving. And he likes my cooking, so we can't go wrong there." John joked. "But it's really not much of a compliment to say I cook better than him."

Hal glared jokingly. "Hey now, I bet this guy can make a few good meals."

"Eggs and toast do not count as a meal." John remarked. His kissed James's head before lifting the bars up to make sure he doesn't fall.

"Okay, then, he can make one good meal." Hal said.

"Canned soup doesn't count either." John laughed. "And neither does ramen, even if you put an egg in it."

Hal sighed. "Well, he sounds useless then."

John kissed Hal once more, hands still on the rails of the crib. "Never useless." He looked Hal straight in the eyes, and, even in the dark room, he can see as they sparkle with the light just outside. "He's actually kind of perfect."

"Well he sounds really cool." Hal smiled. "Almost as cool as you." This time it was Hal that kissed John, lightly pecking the man's lips with his.

At that moment, whether James was aware of what was going on or now, he sighed. The kind that you do after something long and hard was finally finished. Hal leaned into John, pressing his head against the man's chest as the watched James sleep.

"This is just the beginning." John said, a smile wide on his face.

"The beginning of something great, though." Hal smiled up at the man.


End file.
